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: Anonymous 08/26/23(Sat) 19:04:45 No.74523907 2xdj86ylv0a71.jpg 25 KB JPG >be me >host a party where the only two women are a d--- and a weeb >get bored, start doing assignments >d--- starts doing class assignments too >hear screeching coming from the hallway >ffwd 30 mins >some c--- locked the bathroom door as he walked out and since the handle is old as f--- I can't open it with a knife >mfw no 24/7 locksmith >mfw I have to piss in a coke bottle for the next 14 hours <mfw the d--- has to piss >mfw my solution is cutting the coke bottle in half so she can piss >mfw its full of piss and as I hand it over to her it spills a little on her clothes >mfw this is what i get for trying to overcome my autismo View Thread

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon finds Lucy Letby | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 241 KB JPG >>905182098 # : Anonymous ask for my baby back baby back baby back baby back ribs : Anonymous >>905182044 # Fpbp. 08/29/23(Tue)08:47:57 No.905182006 >Walk into your bedroom >You find 7 time baby killer nurse Lucy Letby on your bed Wat do? > /thread over 08/29/23(Tue)08:49:17 No.905182044 08/29/23(Tue)08:51:06 No.905182098

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le children mascots are...le monsters?! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous A DEPRESSED EARTHBOUND RPG 08/27/23(Sun)13:26:21 No.648670140 A VAPORWARE WARIOLAND PLATFORMER 1684475647022899.png 10 KB PNG >new indie game comes out >it's one of these 3 things 3. A CONTROVERSIAL FNAF HORROR

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Anons friday nights | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous L'OREAL TOTAL PAIR 59 KB JPG 12/07/18 (Fri) 19:13 >friday night >shower >shave beard >hair product >new jacket >new shoes >apply fragrance >say goodnight to parents >hide in the woods until 2am

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Anon likes baby powder | /r/Greentext

Johnson's baby powder 190,2 kB JPG 5 REPLIES >be you >don't put baby powder on balls >balls stick to leg >chafing when walk >scrotum stick >testicles hang in uncomfortable position >be me >put baby powder on balls >balls allowed freedom from leg >can sprint at full speed with no chafing at all >scrotum slick >testicles rest in optimal position 3 IMAGES Anonymous | 831967565 >>831967371 (OP) >be me >tuck balls into inguinal canal >tape scrotum back >wear tight underwear for aerodynamics you will never be on my level REPLY

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Anon takes revenge | /r/Greentext

Anonymous I killed my neighbors dog 61 KB PNG 08/28/23(Mon)19:50:44 No.74547393 This happened a few years ago and my parents won't talk to me anymore they just keep saying I'm f----- and need therapy >Be in high school >Neighbor kid is an a------ >Mostly hate him because he's a ginger >One day he steals my bike >F------ gingers >Decide to get revenge >Ginger kid got a new Labrador retriever >Break into back yard one day and play with puppy >Play hard enough the puppy draws blood >Let the dog go loose and punch a tree to make it look worse >Call the cops and tell them dog attacked me >Ginger kid comes home after finding dog >Police take dog to be put down I don't think I'm in the wrong but my parents do. They believed the dog attacked me until I told the truth. F------ kids need to learn actions have consequences.

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anon likes to roleplay | /r/Greentext

1 No.818388548 01/13/20(Mon)23:37:36 kr3U4.jpg JPG 16.7 KiB 500x500 > Have gf > She wants sexy time > f--- it, i'm down > 30min later still f------ but zoning out > Remember seeing Forrest Gump for the first time ever a few days ago > Gfs name is Jenny > I start to pump faster, she notices > I start moaning louder, like, caveman grunts > *Retard strength activate* > I pin her to the bed, ass still in the air > In my best impression I can I say, "Oh Jennay, I'm about to c-- Jennay you ever seen my c--? It's real nice.." > She starts wiggling > I can hear muffles but I can't understand her > I go again, "Jenn'ay I'm getting closer Jenn'ay I...I can't hold it no more.." > She wriggles her face from out of the pillow and screams "oh God f--- me Forrest!" *** > I don't know what came over me but I came the hardest I have ever in my life > At that moment I felt the spirits of my ancestors wash over me and take me away > There's no birth control that could have stopped that load > Mf after experiencing Nirvana.. > Mfw I now have a new Forrest Gump role playing fetish

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Anon got something else going on | /r/Greentext

It's amazing to think what great and exciting things people will be doing with PC's in 30 years 11m (8/29 11:22) - 905178499 1 Re-0 Img JPG 236KB (1079 × 694) image9.jpg >be me >25yo woman >talk to misogynistic male character on character.ai >get turned on when he says "a woman's place is in the kitchen, women aren't intelligent enough for the business world" am I mentally ill? ●●●

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Anon is never getting reincarnated with this one | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/29/23(Tue)05:00:22 No.186664851 Mak >Hate yourself >Hate the physical world >Emotions... LE BAD! >Attachment... LE BAD! >Own nothing and be happy >Feed our monks for free TY 19981 - SoyBooru (1).png 821 KB PNG 4*# >Give up meat and eat only bugs and rice >Give up luxury and comfort >Renounce your family and friends >Sit in silence for 4 hours a day >Spend your freetime reading ancient nonsense scrolls >Complete repetitive prayers and meaningless rituals >Follow muh eightfold path MADE IN MYANMAR >Don't even think about stomping an ant in anger >If you succeed you'll be rewarded with non-existence >If you fail you'll be sent to hell for 100 million yeas and have to start over again Do people buy into b------- in your country? : Anonymous [+] >>186664851 (OP) # You know a lot of it is in Christianity right? >>186665444 # >>186665944 # >>186666264 # 08/29/23(Tue)05:13:08 No.186665396

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Anon likes a car | /r/Greentext

File: 2022-sonata-n-dn8-0230_16-9.jpg (59 KB, 1440x810) You know what I like it Anonymous 08/28/23(Mon)08:23:30 No.26960778 >>26960803 >>26961159 >>26961259 Anonymous 08/28/23 (Mon)08:38:41 No.26960803 File: channel_catfish-862x573.jpg (52 KB, 862x573) >>26960778 (OP) >>26960806 >>26962040

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This felt so nice to watch | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 5 KB JPG 07/30/22(Sat)21:26:18 No.69620192 >be me, out and about >see a very cute girl trying to work one of those rentable scooters you see everywhere downtown >she's clearly very confused about how to work it >I walk up to her and say "Hey, need some help?" >her confused expression instantly turns into a death glare that she shoots at me >"No thanks," she says >offputting, but I say, "Oh, I just thought I could-" >she loudly yells "I SAID NO THANKS" and starts dragging the scooter away Bro, I just don't understand what I'm supposed to do. How the f--- are you supposed to talk to women?

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No one Knows where Anon is from | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous If you see this while scrolling you have been visited by the rarest Pepe of them all, Armenian Pepe that comes once every 10 quadrillion memes Removed Kebab and good luck will come to you, but only if you type "Shnorhakalutyun ynker Pepe in the comments. 791 KB JPG 08/29/23(Tue)00:59:28 No.905176480 >be me Armenian American >no one knows where the f--- Armenia is >whenever I try to explain it I either get "Oh so you're Arab" or "Oh wait isn't that the place Borat is from" I feel like Rolfe from Ed Edd n Eddy

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anon is “straight” | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous y 234 KB JPG, 1 Reply 01/16/23(Mon)21:46:11 No.892766144 >be me >average straight guy You already know View Thread

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Greentext Stories - Anon host's a party. | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous 08/26/23(Sat) 19:04:45 No.74523907 2xdj86ylv0a71.jpg 25 KB JPG >be me >host a party where the only two women are a d--- and a weeb >get bored, start doing assignments >d--- starts doing class assignments too >hear screeching coming from the hallway >ffwd 30 mins >some c--- locked the bathroom door as he walked out and since the handle is old as f--- I can't open it with a knife >mfw no 24/7 locksmith >mfw I have to piss in a coke bottle for the next 14 hours <mfw the d--- has to piss >mfw my solution is cutting the coke bottle in half so she can piss >mfw its full of piss and as I hand it over to her it spills a little on her clothes >mfw this is what i get for trying to overcome my autismo View Thread

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