Anonymous 11/08/24 (Fri)17:26:48 No.79388858 >>79388164 (OP) >be me >be male >be 47 >be in Columbus >have brown hair >have white Ford Ranger pickup >have cute and funny 13 year old girl in passenger seat >get a free shoutout from the government jelly anons?

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Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous >Be me >Male nurse >Need pen >Check my front pocket >Find a rectal thermometer Some a------ has my pen. Settings Mobile Home 02/07/25(Fri)13:14:36 No.80292626 240 KB PNG Lähi- Apu

File: 350px-0773-CWC23.jpg (25 KB, 350×263) ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)12:47:55 No.147369825 >>147369837 >>147369840 >>147370563 He seems like the least autistic comic book creator now. ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)14:31:45 No.147370985 Said it before and I'll say it again, the man was a trailblazer: >Self-insert. >Sexual content in children's entertainment. >Portrays himself as all-powerful, but still pathetic. >Uses his work to try and get IRL sympathy. >Can't stop running his goddamn mouth on social media. >No original ideas, just combines other people's intellectual property. >Writes at a fourth-grade level. >Draws at a third-grade level. >Makes people he hates villains in his comic. >His comic takes place in a little hugbox where he's always in the right. >Thinks he's coming off as heroic, even as he acts like a Saturday morning cartoon villain. >Apes anime poorly. >Plot so thin that even the characters don't seem that invested in it. >Wastes entire pages on domestic horseshit. >Traces artwork and still can't get it right. >Loves multi-national corporations so much that he will put ads for them in his comics gratis. The crippling fear of gay guys is the only thing that would prevent Classic Chris-Chan from being a major player at any modern comics / cartoon studio.

Anonymous 01/27/25(Mon) 16:05:10 No.208203934 IMG_5146.jpg 74 KB JPG >try climing corporate ladder >have to fight narcissistic bosses while your dest floods with paperwork >work construction or other handyman work >have to live with constant body aches and fatigue >try easy entry level job >everybody looks down on you and treat you like s--- There really is no way out, is there?

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Anon is Serbian | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)21:40:02 No.876602853 FA058BB5-A08B-48F6-8E7D-DE8F29702DBD.jpg 50 KB JPG >be me >Serbian >family is pretty racist >hit it off with a Croat girl and start dating her >eventually decide to break it to my dad >He's sitting down reading and I say there's something I want to tell him >I explain to him that I've met someone who I love and want to spend the rest of my life with >"You better not be telling me you're gay anon." >say that I am not gay, and that I've been dating a Croat girl for a few months now >he gives me a harsh look, throws his book at me, & starts yelling and cursing at the top of his lungs >mfw I probably should've just told him I was gay

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Anon is a political analyst | /r/Greentext

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

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Anon gets a haircut | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/29/18(Tue)12:49:54 No.45755456 YgmcQiK.jpg 46 KB JPG >try to get a Chad haircut >comes out looking like pic related What the f--- am I doing wrong? I went to a proper hair stylist that cost $100. Should I shave it all off?

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Water into Whine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Water saving nozzle accessory 476 KB PNG >See ordinary tap 11/08/24(Fri)07:49:19 No.79385061 >Fill cup (500ml) with water >Government says I wasted water >Install water saving tap >Fill cup (500ml) >Government says I saved water How does this thing work?

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Generational beauty | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/23/24(Wed)03:05:05 No.204764813 Margret Qualleyin the Substance.jpg 164 KB JPG >film about youth vs aging in women >cast a literal 30 year old Millennial hag as the representation of youth Why not a 20 year old Zoomette? Which Zoomette would you have cast? Anonymous >>204764813 (OP) # 10/23/24(Wed) 03:05:57 No.204764831 >Why not a 20 year old Zoomette? they're ugly

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Anon Hated Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes | /r/Greentext

File: 1727339926569636.jpg (185 KB, 1376x1376) Anonymous 11/07/24(Thu)07:11:19 No.693919505 >>693919656 >>693919701 >>693920092 >>693922917 >>693923125 >>693923452 >>693923627 >>693925021 >>693925517 >>693927648 >>693930225 >>693930593 >>693932739 >>693932821 >>693933287 >>693933448 >>693934042 >>693939263 >>693939501 >>693941031 >>693941678 >>693941907 >>693943197 >>693944913 >>693946010 >writes her being tortured and having her head shaved >writes her getting r---- by a 13 year old boy >writes her having live surgery performed on her without anesthetic, showing her writhing in agony as her innards are moved around >writes it so there's a second bomb inside of her that detonates anyway rendering the surgery pointless What the f--- was up with Kojima in 2014? Anonymous 11/07/24(Thu)08:15:12 No.693923319 >>693943250 >>693924191 >Kojima purposely made her look like underage j------- >Lol jk she's like 30 years old What did he mean by this? Anonymous 11/07/24(Thu)08:19:22 No.693923556 Even in Smash Bros., her spirit caused bomb effects. >> Anonymous 11/07/24(Thu)09:31:18 No.693927648 ►>>693929549 File: tumblr_pijaupEllk1vtcma00(...).jpg (107 KB, 960x718) POLICE STATION tonight's episode: THE WRITER'S BARELY-DISGUISED FETISH tonights-episode.tumblr.com >>693919505 (OP) Oh you know why Anonymous 11/07/24(Thu)11:12:09 No.693933287 >>693936164 >>693919505 (OP) >>693935763 Why didn't Boss arrest her and remand her to his quarters as his prisoner during the events of Peace Walker? And why didn't he impregnate her so that her large pregnant tummy would render her incapable of any further clandestine intelligence work? Anonymous 11/07/24(Thu)13:02:48 No.693939263 >>693919505 (OP) He wanted to torture and kill your waifu and he was right to do so.

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Anon realizes depression is cringe | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 9 KB JPG cringe 05/06/21(Thu)20:52:32 No.853820308 >be me ? >have deppression >go to hospital for suicidal thoughts >got meds that never worked >realize deppression is > litteraly just decide to not have it anymore >mfw it f------ worked 1 Reply View Thread

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Anon believes the best kind of woman is the Quiet woman | /r/Greentext

⠀ Anonymous 11/05/24(Tue)22:46:57 No.79358762 >character named Quite >she's literally quiet, doesn't say a word >somehow becomes one of the best female characters of all time What did Kojima mean by this? 36 KB JPG

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OP likes screaming rockers | /r/Greentext

edward vedward.jpg (355 KB, 650x430) google yandex iqdb wait 11/07/24(Thu)22:22:40 No.927101088 [4] [Reply] OOOHIIIDONTWETTERIWUZA BOXER ORA BAG OOOH YEAHERyeaherheeeyHEEEEYYY CANYOUSEEDEM? QUONDAPORCH .. yeah.. BUTDEYDONWAAAVVE! E 11/07/24(Thu)23:03:51 No.927102963 v 10linkin-park2-articleLarge.jpg (38 KB, 600x473) google yandex iqdb wait Đ 11/07/24(Thu)23:06:11 No.927103054 v THE BEST.jpg (43 KB, 169x299) google yandex iqdb wait I'M GONNA GIVE YOU THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST OF YOU >AAHHHH IM SOO SAAAAADDD - ООООННННННН >SO F------ SAAAAAAAAD >SUPER-F-------DUPER SAAAAA AAAAAADDDDDDD E 11/07/24(Thu)23:09:47 No.927103183 v james-hetfield@2000x1500.jpg (195 KB, 2000x1500) google yandex iqdb wait MASTERA MASTERA. MASTERA OF AH PUPPETSAH THATS WHAT I SAAAYYYYYAAAAAHHHAAAAHH WOOAAAAAHA!

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Anon has her purity ring of resistance | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

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I’d be his friend | /r/Greentext

how it feels to go out with friends "for coffee" but i'm a hot chocolate fan 110 KB JPG >take digital media class in highschool >it's a computer class so you already know that your gonna get some weird kids >one kid in my class though is something I've never seen before >he has a basic nerdy face and a bit overweight but it's what he wears >he comes into class everyday no exception with one of the rainbow hats with a spinner on top, like in a cartoon >on top of that he has a giant lollipop the size of his his that he carries around everywhere, it's fake but still >literally looks like a kid from a cartoon all he needs is some overalls >apart from that he seems pretty normal so idk >I'll see if he does anything else but I just thought it was funny

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But doctor... he's literally me | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Greentext Stories - Anon Gets A Shoutout | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 11/08/24 (Fri)17:26:48 No.79388858 >>79388164 (OP) >be me >be male >be 47 >be in Columbus >have brown hair >have white Ford Ranger pickup >have cute and funny 13 year old girl in passenger seat >get a free shoutout from the government jelly anons?

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