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there are always 3 types of sims gamers: benevolent god: okay i'm gonna set everything up really nice and make sure everyone is comfortable and then i'll zoom right in and watch carefully oops is your hunger bar getting low don't worry shh i have that taken care of i have a cheat shhh it's okay keep painting that weird purple thing i love you distant god: i'll set your life in motion but then i'm gonna pull back and let you do your thing maybe i'1l wander the town a bit i'm sure you'll be fine loki: 00PS WHERE'D THAT DOOR GO I GUESS YOU'RE TRAPPED AND OH NO DID THE POOL LADDER DISAPPEAR I WONDER HOW LONG YOU CAN SWIM FOR HAHAHAHA F--- YOU MORTAL #I'm benevolent god #l basically plan out their lives and their kid's lives and their gra

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fulgur-caligo-custodis kurlyfryz Power move: Next time you go to the airport, bring a bottle of shampoo, but it's filled with yogurt. When they tell you that liquids aren't allowed Drink it Posted in r/madlads by u/ProbablyM_S reddit
lesbianshepard Jul 24 travelling next week for work. googled the nearest city and none of you are prepared to see what passes for the local style pizza. lesbianshepard Jul 24 this should be a crime lesbianshepard Jul 25 #someone needs to die for this #divorced dad type food #is the local chef a 12 year old latchkey kid? #as a new yorker im about to k J elf #abolish all prisons except one for these guys #that is a crime where I'm from #I'm anti regional food variation shaming but this is a crime man #mamma mia. #i took like a deep shuddering breath #i feel nauseous. #oh no they should be shot #literally the closest thing to anti-Italian racism the reviews are in: Pennsylvania must pay for its crimes
theaccidentfactory Follow I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby theaccidentfactory English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking s about the neighbor's son
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And then there's me.
"YOU FUCKING SLUTS, GO EAT YOUR GODDAMN CEREAL ALREADY, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU GOING TO READ NOW, YOU JUST LEFT YOUR FUCKING BOWL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TABLE, AND THERE IS A PARTY COMING OVER, AND YOU HAVEN'T EVEN TAKEN A FUCKING SHOWER OH MY GOD YOU PIECES OF SHIT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

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Uploaded Jan 09, 2014 at 05:13PM EST

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