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File: 1397875003927 ipg-(99 KB, 800x432, monkey.jpg) Anonymous (ID: qeua1zMS) 04/18/14(Fri)22:36:43 UTC-4 No.542882825 >Be me 15 years old >New tard comes to my school >Locker right next to mine >D------- doesn't know how to open lockers >Constantly have to open it for him >Remember his combination 12-3-24 >One day get an idea >Get a dildo from my friend's house >Bring it to school >Asked my teacher ifI could go to nurse >No one is in hallway >Perfect for my plan >Start unlocking combination >Suddenly third period ends shitstorm of kids come >Quickly shove dildo in locker >Run to end of hallway to watch plan unfold >Nothing happens so I go back to my locker >Sees giant vein coeed dildo >Had >Whole hallway sees including my girlfriend >She's crying now >My nickname is Dildon for the rest of High School >Go to college thinking the past is behind me >People from my old school find my Facebook >Whole thing starts up again >Humiliated for 2 whole years >Decide I'm sick of it >Get an idea >Buy a s--- ton of pocket p------ >Put them in a suitcase >Going to attempt to put all of them under some Douche's bed >Walking to room >Trip over a box of s--- >Suitcase spills over >Pocket p------ everywhere I am now known as "Virgin Viper" FML running out of classrooms wrong locker the whole time

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack
Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #
34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps
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File: 1397875003927 ipg-(99 KB, 800x432, monkey.jpg) Anonymous (ID: qeua1zMS) 04/18/14(Fri)22:36:43 UTC-4 No.542882825 >Be me 15 years old >New tard comes to my school >Locker right next to mine >D------- doesn't know how to open lockers >Constantly have to open it for him >Remember his combination 12-3-24 >One day get an idea >Get a dildo from my friend's house >Bring it to school >Asked my teacher ifI could go to nurse >No one is in hallway >Perfect for my plan >Start unlocking combination >Suddenly third period ends shitstorm of kids come >Quickly shove dildo in locker >Run to end of hallway to watch plan unfold >Nothing happens so I go back to my locker >Sees giant vein coeed dildo >Had >Whole hallway sees including my girlfriend >She's crying now >My nickname is Dildon for the rest of High School >Go to college thinking the past is behind me >People from my old school find my Facebook >Whole thing starts up again >Humiliated for 2 whole years >Decide I'm sick of it >Get an idea >Buy a s--- ton of pocket p------ >Put them in a suitcase >Going to attempt to put all of them under some Douche's bed >Walking to room >Trip over a box of s--- >Suitcase spills over >Pocket p------ everywhere I am now known as "Virgin Viper" FML running out of classrooms wrong locker the whole time

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Uploaded Apr 18, 2014 at 10:49PM EDT

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Greentext Stories

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dildo, school, college, fml, sex toy

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