Woman texting in bed, relating to the defintion of "microcheating."

What Is 'Microcheating?' The Odd Slang Term And Viral Discourse About 'Liking Others' Explained

Internet users have spawned a new slang term that is sparking discourse online, centering on the idea of "microcheating" on one's partner.

Listen, everyone knows that there are boundaries in a relationship when it comes to talking to or flirting with other people. However, the concept of "microcheating" opens a whole new can of worms, blurring the line between what's seen as a microaggression in attraction.

Curious about what the slang term means and where it came from? Let's explain.


What Does 'Microcheating' Mean?

The definition of "microcheating" is behaviors and actions taken by a person in a romantic relationship that, while not explicitly "having an affair," may suggest interest in a person other than their partner. This involves liking someone else's Instagram photos or sending flirty texts to someone that's not your lover.


Where Did The Term 'Microcheating' Come From?

The Pandora's box that is the term "microcheating" was initially opened by The Daily Mail back in 2018, when psychologist Melanie Schilling was interviewed by the publication and gave traits that might indicate the action, stating:

"You might be engaging in micro-cheating if you secretly connect with another person on social media, if you share private jokes, if you downplay the seriousness of your relationship to your partner or if you enter their name under a code in your phone. These are all signs that you are conducting a "covert flirtation" and keeping it from your partner. If you feel you have something to hide – ask yourself why."

Is 'Microcheating' Real?

Since the term's origin, discourse has ensued on social media about whether or not "microcheating" is a real phenomenon. Some people have expressed that accusing someone of microcheating is akin to emotional abuse because telling someone who they can and cannot talk to reads like control issues.

Others have alleged that accusing people of microcheating alludes to self-esteem issues. People have gone so far as to satirically claim that "having friends is microcheating."

katewagner@bsky.social @mcmansionhell having friends is microcheating "When you are giving someone else special attention and oversharing intimacies, this is where it crosses the border into microcheating because we are actively seeking fulfillment outside the relationship." 7:53 PM. Sep 25, 2023
Drew Hewitt @theamazingdrewH This feels an awful lot like justifying emotional abuse CARMILIS INSIDER Business Insider Business Secrecy and deception have no place in a healthy relationship and are signs of 'micro-cheating' - A psychologist addresses the warning signals of this growing trend read.bi/2qWdfs7 II GIF @Business Insider Jan 11, 2018 5:14 PM Jan 19, 2018 • MA What about that time I said, we were on a break"?


Overall, the topic has a lot of nuance. Couples that are in a healthy relationships will likely manage any action akin to microcheating in a healthy way (obviously). For those who aren't that healthy, a microcheating-adjacent scenario could spell disaster.



For the full history of Microcheating, be sure to check out our entry on the slang term here for even more information.




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