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Dumbledore-posting

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Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)05:16:46 No.592339286 >>592340025 >>592349607 >>592355112 >>592361079 >>592364302 >>592367412 >>592368863 >>592369286 >>592373847 >>592376556 >>592377124 >>592378657 >>592380217 >>592380718 >>592386813 >>592393138 >>592400338 >>592401207 >>592402007 1644619646869.png (858 KB, 830x664) google yandex iqdb wait >>592338610 >"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRYYY POO000000000|||||||||| TITTEEEERRRR", Dumbledore roared calmy with the wrath of a thousand suns >"FIRST YOU PUT YOUR NAME AS "HARRIETTA" IN THE GOBLET OF FIYA, THEN YOU USED HERMIONE'S HAIR TO MAKE A POLYJUICE POTION AND LET ALL THOSE SLYTHERIN S---- RUN A TRAIN ON YOU, NOW I CATCH YOU PLAYING A FEMALE CHARACTER?" >Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face >YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR YOU FOUR EYED LITTLE S---! I HAD HOPED IT WOULDN'T HAVE TO COME TO THIS, BUT YOU'VE LEFT ME WITH NO OTHER CHOICE! >YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! >suddenly a noose dropped down from the ceiling and wrapped around Harry's neck before being hoisted back up >"41 BILLION POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR" Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)07:47:43 No.592355112 ✓ 1622208435494.jpg (906 KB, 2544x4000) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:08:00 No.592373847 ✓ >>592339286 This is the first time 41% memes were funny for me in a while Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)12:26:58 No.592380217 ✓ 1618498608350.jpg (94 KB, 600x600) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >>Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face 929bb62f9f38f5059770a54c5988048a848356c9.jpg 160 KB JPG >Yes, yes, well done Hufflepuff, well done. However, recent events must be taken into account. And I have a few last minute points to award. {The Gryffindor students look up.} ToMissHermione Granger, for the use of cool intellect against discord trannies, 50 points. {Applause.} >Harry: (Pats) Good job. >Dumbledore: Second, toMr.Ronald Weasley, for tweeting "transwomen aren't people, let alone women" (Ronlooks atHarryand mouths, 'Me?'Harrynods, and mouths, "You!"} ..50 points. (Applause) And third, toMr. Harry Potter, for casting "reparo" on the crotch of every trans student you came across, I award Gryffindor house 60 points. (Immense cheering.) >Hermione: We're tied with Hufflepuff! >Dumbledore: And finally, it takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to stand up to your friends. I award 10 points toJK Rowling! >{The castle erupted in cheers) >Dumbledore: which means, I think, we are need of a change of decoration! Anonymous 03/18/22 (Fri)08:50:00 No.592361079 ✓ | Anonymous 03/18/22 (Fri) 14:03:56 No.592386813 ✓ 1646425708020.gif (515 KB, 510x510) google yandex | lol.gif (3.4 MB, 588x588) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >Dumbledore clapped twice. Ropes appeared around 40% of the hufflepuffs' throats, then swiftly hoisted them up in place of the banners. Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:47:33 No.592377124 ✓ 1462069005593.png (145 KB, 300x297) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 Jesus Christ put me in the screen cap! Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri) 10:16:35 No.592369286 ✓ 1646003077541.jpg (27 KB, 325x331) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)06:27:05 No.592347107 >>592348672 >>592348897 >>592349607 >>592376652 >>592380785 >>592384087 1647385610773.jpg (319 KB, 768x1564) google yandex iqdb wait >>592335921 (OP) >YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! f------ lost Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)06:43:26 No.592348897 ✓ 1645311778047.gif (1.49 MB, 420x279) google yandex iqdb wait AW >>592347107 >casting "reparo" on the crotch of every trans student you came across My sides. >>592348672 Join the 51% of course. >>592339286 why is calmposting the funniest f------ thing to me? this s--- gets me every time, especially when there's some d------- spell thrown in there Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)13:22:48 No.592384087 >>592390639 >>592401652 >>592347197 https://voca.ro/163MfCndNtcW (embed) 5 minutes in audacity >>592339286 >>YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! I've prepared a special gift for Slytherin https://vocaroo.com/nUt57wURU0C (embed) >>suddenly a noose dropped down from the ceiling and wrapped around Harry's neck before being hoisted back up >>"41 BILLION POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR" Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:40:26 No. 1634770626733.jpg (40 KB, 524x228 YUNDAN >>592339286 F------ kek >>592385384 lost my s--- at the ending AEW WRESTLING Get Captcha Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)13:41:47 No.592385384>>592385921 >>592400534 >>592400924 >>592401245 1601007106521.jpg (42 KB, 644x390) google yandex iqdb wait YUNBAU Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)07:30:06 No.592353436 >>592353675 >>592353873 >>592354013 >>592355365 >>592360498 >>592378706 >>592379253 >>592383362 >>592390636 1634982221640.jpg (126 KB, 769x530) google yandex iqdb wait A TYPE THE CAPTCHA HERE TNT >Turn to page 394 >Trannies? >But sir we've just been learning about mild ADHD and OCD, We're not meant to be starting advanced deviancies like Transgenders and Groomers for weeks? >Quiet, Now who can tell me the difference Between an woman and a t-----? >A t----- is someone who tries but ultimately fails to become a real XX chromosome woman. A woman, HOWEVER, has no choice, with each full moon she menstruates and is capable of pregnancy >That's the second time you've spoken out of turn miss Granger 10 points from Gryffindor, now homework on my desk by Monday morning two pages on trannies and how to recognise them actually you don't need to because they never pass Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)17:57:06 No.592400924 ✓ 1620387177395.jpg (33 KB, 578x419) google yandex iqdb wait
: Anonymous 09/11/19(Wed)15:22:13 No.120865979 59C4689A-C4A6-4670-A2FB-EF7DA6DF7B47.png 1.14 MB PNG >ONE POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EACH JEW KILLED IN THE HOLOCAUST >Draco and the kids start cheering >Gandalf looks at the screen >ZERO POINTS!
File: dumble f--.jpg (80 KB, 899x470) Based Potter? Anonymous (ID: +xtovYTG) 01/03/23 (Tue)06:44:06 No.410702226 >>410704399 >>410706763 >>410707637 "Harry Potter!?!? What have you been doing in the Gas Chamber of Secrets? Why is there an amazon delivery of large ovens? And where TF have all the bank goblins gone!?!," Dumbledore whispered inaudibly, shaking the foundations of heaven and earth. "It wasn't me headmaster. I promise." Harry said, rather r*tardedly. "I will blame Slatherine then. 6 million points to Griffindoor!"
124KiB, 634x964, 78556658478.jpg View Same Google iqdb SauceNAO Trace Anonymous 1 year and 217 days ago No.151696257 View Reply >The applause faded as Dumbledore raised his hand to speak >"Thank you, students, for that most heartwarming welcome back to Hog warts. I daresay Professor McGonagall more than rose to the occasion in my absence." >"As you all know, I spent the last few months attending a leadership work shop at Uagando, the African academy of pagan voodoo magic. There I le arned a great deal about all sorts of exotic sorcery, such as the ability to tr ansfigure oneself into a goat to escape punishment for crimes." >"However, what I found most fascinating was their tradition of sorting stu dents not by arbitrary houses, but by nation of origin. Which is why I'm ple ased to announce that Hogwarts will now be doing the same, as I'm sure you've already noticed." >He gestured to the flags of England, Wales, Scotland and Ireland hung a bove the four tables. >"But there will be time to discuss this later. For now, let us begin tonight's feast!" >With a wave of his hand, Dumbledore summoned the food to the tables. Plates of scrumptious pies and vegetables glazed just right, savory cuts of turkey swimming in gravy, delectable treacle tart s and trays of warm fudge, and tankards of butterbeer all appeared before the eyes of the students... >Except for the Irish. >At the Irish table appeared only potatoes. Heaps and heaps of brown, raw potatoes. >Dumbledore smiled at the dumbstruck Irish students. "What's the matter, children? Something wrong with your dinner?" >Nervously, Seamus Finnegan picked up a fork and prepared to poke one of the potatoes. >"WEAPON!" Dumbledore cried, "THAT MICK HAS A WEAPON! WATCH OUT!" He brandished his wand at Seamus, whos e hand exploded in a spray of red mist. >"IS THIS HOW YOU LEPRECHAUNS REPAY MY HOSPITALITY? MISTER FILCH, ESCORT IRELAND TO THE GAS CH AMBER OF SECRETS AT ONCE! ENGLISH STUDENTS, YOU MAY TAKE THEIR COMMON ROOM!"
Anonymous 1 year and 37 days ago No.159793842 Report >Harry, did I ever tell you about our Gamekeeper, Rubeus Hagrid? He used to be a student at Hogwarts, just like you, until he was expelled fo r sicking his pet spider on a mudblo- I mean, muggle-born student 50 y ears ago. I knew he was innocent but I stood by and said nothing when they snapped his wand and sent him home. I suspected that Tom Riddl e was the real culprit, but again I said nothing. Anyway his innocence w as never proven, so I hired him as as a teacher lol. He was later responsible for a hyp ogriff mauling a student on his first day on the job, but was a filthy Slytherin so it wa s all peachy. One day students started being attacked in the school again and the Min istry suspected it was the guy who did it last time *snicker* and they came to arrest hi m and send him to Azkaban? You're familiar with Azkaban right? It's the most horrific place on Earth they send bad wizards to be locked up and tortured by having their so uls sucked out by flying demons, s--- is f------ terrifying. Anyway they sent Hagrid th ere and I just stood and watched again. I could have stopped them, but I didn't. Also I think he got r---- by a giant or whatever. He was a good friend.
168KiB, 1920x799, dumbledore.jpg View Same Google iqdb SauceNAO Trace Anonymous 3 years and 203 days ago No.116634507 View Quoted By: >>116635104 >>116635150 Harry, did you put your name in the Goblet of Fire? You asked one of the older students to do it for you? I'm not f------ around, Harry. CRUCIO! How do you like that, huh? DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE?! HARRY!!! HARRY!!! STOP CRYING! You are doing this to yourself. J ust answer my goddamn question. CRUCIO! SECTUMSEMPRA! Harry, this is gonna get real ugly for you real quick. DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE?! DID YOU ASK ONE OF THE OLDER STUDENTS TO DO I T FOR YOU? EXPULSO! Ok, that does it. Minerva! Bring me Ron Weasley... ...So, Harry. Care to answer now?... No?... AVADA KEDAVRA!!! AND THERE GOES RONALD BILIUS WEASLEY!!! THAT'S ON YOU! STOP CRYING, HARRY!!! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!! MINERVA, BRING GINNY WEASLEY!!! I'M ASKING YOU AGAIN, HARRY!!! DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE?! STILL NO ANSWER?? JUST SOBBING?? AVADA KEDAVRA!!! GUESS THAT'S THE END OF ROMANCE, THEN! ACCIO W88!!!!! OK HARRY LAST CHANCE BEFORE I TURN OFF THE LIGHTS FOR GOOD!!! DID!!!! YOU!!!! PUT!!!! YOUR!!!! NAME!!!! IN!!!! THE!!!! GOBLET!!!! OF!!!! FIRE???!!! WELL HARRY, I GUESS THAT'S GONNA BE IT THEN REDUCT-
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About

Dumbledore-posting refers to posts, greentexts and copypastas that parody Dumbledore's character from the fantasy book series Harry Potter by author J. K. Rowling. Common themes in Dumbledore -posting style parodies include how all Slytherins are depicted as evil, Dumbledore's favoritism towards Gryffindor, and author J. K. Rowling's in-book treatment of minorities and her real-life opinions on transgender rights. Common phrases include "he said calmly", as well as "Well done ______, well done. HOWEVER".

Origin

J.K. Rowling's seven-part Harry Potter was serialized between the years 1997 and 2007, and was adapted into an eight-part film series by Warner Bros between 2001 and 2011.[1] The books and movies have been generally well-received over the years, and are considered a modern children's classic.[2] The series has also been criticized over the years for its rigid moralism, its stereotypical depictions of minority characters, and various plotholes revolving around the "rules" of the magical world.[3] Rowling has been criticized her her opinions on transgender rights over the years as well.[4]

The earliest known instance of Dumbledore posting was uploaded to 4chan on June 6th, 2016, when a user began a threat with an image of Dumbledore alongside text impersonating his style of speaking. The post read, "Yes yes Well done Slytherin. Well done Slytherin. >However" (seen below).[5] This is referencing the iconic scene at the end of the first movie, where Slytherin was poised to win the house cup, but Dumbledore swooped in and gave points to Gryffindor instead.

59KiB, 768x576, hp15.jpg Anonymous 6 years and 210 days ago No.70537106 Quoted By: >>70537254 >>70538173 >>70538211 >>705400 >>70554666 >>70555611 >>70561138 >>70562053 Yes Yes Well done Slytherin. Well done Slytherin. >However

Spread

The aforementioned thread also contained a copypasta from " "Wizard People, Dear Reader"[6] that continued to parody Dumbledore's speech (seen below).

germanwings Anonymous 6 years and 210 days ago No.70539209 Report Quoted By: >>70539371 >>70539932 >>70540561 >>70540592 >>70541279 >>70541342 >>70543029 >>70544005 >>70546102 >>70546411 >>70546628 >>70553243 >>70553605 >>70553736 >>70555662 >>70555780 HAMMED The cafeteria is a crazed sea of almost-vacationing students. The only thing that stands between the kids and summer vacati on is Hardcastle McCormick's hokey points awards show. Dumbledore laments that yet another year has passed and he is e ven closer to his end, but soon commences in the announcing of the points. Gryffindor has a measly 312 points. The students' morale is very low at this fart of a total. Hufferpuffer has 420 points, and that's pretty good for the remedial class that they are. Viacom, well, this year Viacom has earned 480 points. And Slytherin, Slytherin has an even 6,000 points. Coming in first for the first time in front of Gryffindor, Slytherin seem to be the champions. 'However', Dumbledore says, 'last minute points are thus.' Snake is seemingly on the edge of her seat. 'To the Wretched Harmony, for aiding some unmentioned titans and knowing your spells in desperate times, you are awarded 300 points.' Everyone claps, and Harmony feels like she could cry out a second self of tears so that she could have someone to hug. She feels accepted, thou gh. 'Ronnie the Bear. Ronnie the Bear Weasel, you are bravery, you are courage, you are chess. One thousand points!' The applause begins to increa se, as if they know who is to be honoured next and they are just getting ready. 'And of course, the keeper of our hearts, and the true magician who has bewitched us all, Harry Potter, receives six million points for vanquishing t he Dracula!' The crowd goes a------, clapping their asses off in a mixture of admiration for Harry and excitement for f------ summer-time to finally get here. Th e new points mean that Gryffindor are now the champs of the year. They get to hold the trophy and drink from it whatever they wish. The entire cafeteria, Mouthoil, Snake, and Pitstains included, join in supporting Harry and summer-time. The applause is gigantic. The universe onl y accepts love today, and, luckily, everyone is in accordance.

Another popular Dumbledore-posting trend follows the format, "Well done _____, HOWEVER." The post is often accompanied by a picture of Dumbledore. Other versions of Dumbledore-posting reference the Dumbledore said calmly meme, portraying him screaming and acting unhinged, followed by the ironic phrase "he said calmly". As a nod to Dumbledore's association with the wizard-supremacist Grindelwald as well as Rowling herself, the posts also often portray Dumbledore as a bigot (seen below).

: Anonymous 09/11/19(Wed)15:22:13 No.120865979 59C4689A-C4A6-4670-A2FB-EF7DA6DF7B47.png 1.14 MB PNG >ONE POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EACH JEW KILLED IN THE HOLOCAUST >Draco and the kids start cheering >Gandalf looks at the screen >ZERO POINTS!
File: dumble f--.jpg (80 KB, 899x470) Based Potter? Anonymous (ID: +xtovYTG) 01/03/23 (Tue)06:44:06 No.410702226 >>410704399 >>410706763 >>410707637 "Harry Potter!?!? What have you been doing in the Gas Chamber of Secrets? Why is there an amazon delivery of large ovens? And where TF have all the bank goblins gone!?!," Dumbledore whispered inaudibly, shaking the foundations of heaven and earth. "It wasn't me headmaster. I promise." Harry said, rather r*tardedly. "I will blame Slatherine then. 6 million points to Griffindoor!"

Other phrases utilized in Dumbledore-posting include the word "non-plussed" and the phrase "stretched his legs," which critics have noted to have been overused in the books (seen below).[7]

Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)05:16:46 No.592339286 >>592340025 >>592349607 >>592355112 >>592361079 >>592364302 >>592367412 >>592368863 >>592369286 >>592373847 >>592376556 >>592377124 >>592378657 >>592380217 >>592380718 >>592386813 >>592393138 >>592400338 >>592401207 >>592402007 1644619646869.png (858 KB, 830x664) google yandex iqdb wait >>592338610 >"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRYYY POO000000000|||||||||| TITTEEEERRRR", Dumbledore roared calmy with the wrath of a thousand suns >"FIRST YOU PUT YOUR NAME AS "HARRIETTA" IN THE GOBLET OF FIYA, THEN YOU USED HERMIONE'S HAIR TO MAKE A POLYJUICE POTION AND LET ALL THOSE SLYTHERIN S---- RUN A TRAIN ON YOU, NOW I CATCH YOU PLAYING A FEMALE CHARACTER?" >Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face >YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR YOU FOUR EYED LITTLE S---! I HAD HOPED IT WOULDN'T HAVE TO COME TO THIS, BUT YOU'VE LEFT ME WITH NO OTHER CHOICE! >YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! >suddenly a noose dropped down from the ceiling and wrapped around Harry's neck before being hoisted back up >"41 BILLION POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR" Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)07:47:43 No.592355112 ✓ 1622208435494.jpg (906 KB, 2544x4000) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:08:00 No.592373847 ✓ >>592339286 This is the first time 41% memes were funny for me in a while Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)12:26:58 No.592380217 ✓ 1618498608350.jpg (94 KB, 600x600) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >>Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face 929bb62f9f38f5059770a54c5988048a848356c9.jpg 160 KB JPG >Yes, yes, well done Hufflepuff, well done. However, recent events must be taken into account. And I have a few last minute points to award. {The Gryffindor students look up.} ToMissHermione Granger, for the use of cool intellect against discord trannies, 50 points. {Applause.} >Harry: (Pats) Good job. >Dumbledore: Second, toMr.Ronald Weasley, for tweeting "transwomen aren't people, let alone women" (Ronlooks atHarryand mouths, 'Me?'Harrynods, and mouths, "You!"} ..50 points. (Applause) And third, toMr. Harry Potter, for casting "reparo" on the crotch of every trans student you came across, I award Gryffindor house 60 points. (Immense cheering.) >Hermione: We're tied with Hufflepuff! >Dumbledore: And finally, it takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to stand up to your friends. I award 10 points toJK Rowling! >{The castle erupted in cheers) >Dumbledore: which means, I think, we are need of a change of decoration! Anonymous 03/18/22 (Fri)08:50:00 No.592361079 ✓ | Anonymous 03/18/22 (Fri) 14:03:56 No.592386813 ✓ 1646425708020.gif (515 KB, 510x510) google yandex | lol.gif (3.4 MB, 588x588) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >Dumbledore clapped twice. Ropes appeared around 40% of the hufflepuffs' throats, then swiftly hoisted them up in place of the banners. Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:47:33 No.592377124 ✓ 1462069005593.png (145 KB, 300x297) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 Jesus Christ put me in the screen cap! Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri) 10:16:35 No.592369286 ✓ 1646003077541.jpg (27 KB, 325x331) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)06:27:05 No.592347107 >>592348672 >>592348897 >>592349607 >>592376652 >>592380785 >>592384087 1647385610773.jpg (319 KB, 768x1564) google yandex iqdb wait >>592335921 (OP) >YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! f------ lost Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)06:43:26 No.592348897 ✓ 1645311778047.gif (1.49 MB, 420x279) google yandex iqdb wait AW >>592347107 >casting "reparo" on the crotch of every trans student you came across My sides. >>592348672 Join the 51% of course. >>592339286 why is calmposting the funniest f------ thing to me? this s--- gets me every time, especially when there's some d------- spell thrown in there Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)13:22:48 No.592384087 >>592390639 >>592401652 >>592347197 https://voca.ro/163MfCndNtcW (embed) 5 minutes in audacity >>592339286 >>YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! I've prepared a special gift for Slytherin https://vocaroo.com/nUt57wURU0C (embed) >>suddenly a noose dropped down from the ceiling and wrapped around Harry's neck before being hoisted back up >>"41 BILLION POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR" Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:40:26 No. 1634770626733.jpg (40 KB, 524x228 YUNDAN >>592339286 F------ kek >>592385384 lost my s--- at the ending AEW WRESTLING Get Captcha Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)13:41:47 No.592385384>>592385921 >>592400534 >>592400924 >>592401245 1601007106521.jpg (42 KB, 644x390) google yandex iqdb wait YUNBAU Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)07:30:06 No.592353436 >>592353675 >>592353873 >>592354013 >>592355365 >>592360498 >>592378706 >>592379253 >>592383362 >>592390636 1634982221640.jpg (126 KB, 769x530) google yandex iqdb wait A TYPE THE CAPTCHA HERE TNT >Turn to page 394 >Trannies? >But sir we've just been learning about mild ADHD and OCD, We're not meant to be starting advanced deviancies like Transgenders and Groomers for weeks? >Quiet, Now who can tell me the difference Between an woman and a t-----? >A t----- is someone who tries but ultimately fails to become a real XX chromosome woman. A woman, HOWEVER, has no choice, with each full moon she menstruates and is capable of pregnancy >That's the second time you've spoken out of turn miss Granger 10 points from Gryffindor, now homework on my desk by Monday morning two pages on trannies and how to recognise them actually you don't need to because they never pass Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)17:57:06 No.592400924 ✓ 1620387177395.jpg (33 KB, 578x419) google yandex iqdb wait

Various Examples

: Anonymous 07/19/21(Mon)19:50:32 No.153846558 1624203821204.jpg| 126 KB JPG SILENCE! SILENCE! I SAID FUUUUCKING SILENCE!!! I WON'T BE OUTSHOUTED BY A HOUSE OF F------ LOSERS! NEGATIVE 500,000 POINTS TO SLYTHERIN! HOW'D YOU LIKE THAT YOU F------ MONGRELS, YEAH YOU LIKE THAT!??! SHUT UP! SHUT THE F--- UP! YOU DON'T GET TO WIN! I CHOOSE WHO WINS THE HOUSE CUP, ALLL THOSE POINTS YOU AQUIRED THROUGHOUT THE YEAR MEAN F--- ALL! GRYFFINDOR WINS! GRYFFINDOR WINS!!! F--- YOU SLYTHERIN! 6 MILLIONS POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR, BECAUSE I F------ SAID SO!! MR. FILTCH ESCORT EVERY SNIVELING SLYTHERIN STUDENT TO THE DUNGEONS AND HAVE THEM SEPARATED BY PENIS SIZE AND VAGINAL INTEGRITY, I'LL BE VISITING A LITTLE LATER. YOU HEAR THAT SLYTHERINS, I'M GONNA F--- EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU, MAYBE YOU CAN EARN SOME POINTS BACK IF YOU'RE WILLING TO SWALLOW SOME OF MY HEADMASTER LOAD! NOW MR. FILTCH GET THESE MONGRELS OUT OF HERE!! NO000000OWWW!
Anonymous 1 year and 37 days ago No.159793842 Report >Harry, did I ever tell you about our Gamekeeper, Rubeus Hagrid? He used to be a student at Hogwarts, just like you, until he was expelled fo r sicking his pet spider on a mudblo- I mean, muggle-born student 50 y ears ago. I knew he was innocent but I stood by and said nothing when they snapped his wand and sent him home. I suspected that Tom Riddl e was the real culprit, but again I said nothing. Anyway his innocence w as never proven, so I hired him as as a teacher lol. He was later responsible for a hyp ogriff mauling a student on his first day on the job, but was a filthy Slytherin so it wa s all peachy. One day students started being attacked in the school again and the Min istry suspected it was the guy who did it last time *snicker* and they came to arrest hi m and send him to Azkaban? You're familiar with Azkaban right? It's the most horrific place on Earth they send bad wizards to be locked up and tortured by having their so uls sucked out by flying demons, s--- is f------ terrifying. Anyway they sent Hagrid th ere and I just stood and watched again. I could have stopped them, but I didn't. Also I think he got r---- by a giant or whatever. He was a good friend.
Anonymous Sat 03 Sep 2022 01:54:54 No.610981826 Report Quoted By: >>610982357 >>610983790 >>610983929 >>610984313 >>610984508 >>610984748 >>610985524 >>610986396 >>610986767 >>610990138 >>610990269 >"HARRRRRYYYY POTTTTTEERRRRR DID YOU PUT FEMALE PRONOUNS IN THE GOBLET OF BRIDGET" Dumbledore pondered aloud calmly. >"N-no sir, that was the trannies in hufflepuff sir" said Harry in a quivering voice,deathly afraid of the half naked headmaster standing before holding a dakimakura of bridget from guilty gear, "But I don't see the problem honestly, now that shes a girl its not gay to fa..." >"GIRL? T---? GAY, POTTER? YOU THINK I FAP TO BRIDGET BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE A GIRL, POTTER? ITS BECAUSE HE'S A FAILED MAN! THERES NOTHING MORE HOTTER THAN C------ INSIDE A MIND-BROKEN BOY WHO LOOKS LIKE HE STOLE HIS ENTIRE WARDROBE FROM A NEARBY CONVENT." >"But, sir", Harry said as he deigned to stretch the legs of reason to the rabid headmaster "Aren't trannies and femboys both the same flavour of mental illness?" >Harry had little to no time to prepare as the headmaster struck him across the face with the dakimakura he was holding, causing naive student to fall to the ground, and the subsequent stretching of the legs as the Dumbledore stomped on Harry's face repeatedly, calmly. >"ITS JUST DIFFERENT, POTTER! IVE ALWAYS BEEN GAY FOR BRIDGET, POTTER! GRINDLEWALD USED TO DRESS UP AS HIM JUST FOR ME POTTER, AND WOULD DO WONDERFUL THINGS WITH A YOYO AND A BIKELOCK TO MY ANUS. TRANNIES ARE ABOMINATIONS, BRIDGET IS MY OTONOKO. YOU KNOW WHAT OTONOKO MEANS POTTER? IT MEANS BOYWIFE. BRIDGET WAS MY BOYWIFE, POTTER. AND THE TRANNIES TOOK HIM AWAY FROM ME! NO MORE!" >Dumbledore stopped his calm onslaught upon Harry's fragile frame, and handed him a pistol. >"here you go, Potter. You've always had the chud phenotype, with the glasses and the jewish actor and whatnot. I need you to take this gun and shoot up the hufflepuff common room. For my sake. Make sure to scream something about "heil jk rowling 1488" to divert attention from myself. Off you go. 45 points to gryffindor"
Anonymous Sun 12 Jul 2020 02:35:40 No.516597187 Quoted By: >>516597310 >>516597609 >>516597852 >>516597957 >>516600174 >>516600879 >>516601809 >>516602434 >Hermione: He called me a t-----. >Hagrid: He did not! >Harry: What's a t-----? >Hermione: It means transvestite. T----- is a really foul name for someone who's born in the wrong body. Someone who doesn't have the proper genitals. Someone like me. It's not a term one usually hears in civilized conversation. >Hagrid: See the thing is, Harry, there's some Terfs, like the Rowling family, who think they're better than everyone else because they're what people call "real women." >Harry: That's horrible! >Ron: [stretched his legs to burp up another slug] It's disgusting. >Hagrid: And it's codswallop to boot. "real women." Why, there isn't a person alive today who hasn't wanked it to a ladyboy at one time or another. More to the point, they've yet to come up with a bathroom our Hermione couldn't get into. Come 'ere. Don't you think on it, Hermione. Don't you think on it for one minute.
[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] File: 1579177888545.png (916 KB, 760x573) >he said calmly >"Welcome students, welcome to another year here at Hogwarts. To our First Years I have a few notices I wish to announce. An unmarked, random room in this castle will kill anyone entering it. It is such because I decided to hide an extremely dangerous and powerful artifact at this institution for children. Please also note that if you enter the schools forest, it will be a very painful and certain death from the dozens of ferocious creatures roaming it." >"Despite being the safest place in the world for wizards, there is a coin flips chance that one my employees this year is on first-name basis with the most evil wizard in living memory. I am of course speaking of VOLDEMORT. Yes, I said his name. I am not scared for my life, but you should be. Which one is it this year? Personally, my bet is on professor Snape." >"I am also pleased to announce that the quinquennial Death Tournament will be held this year. The three underage contestant will endure three deadly trials for no other reason than my personal amusement. I encourage anyone from monetarily struggling families to enter so that you can recover from the outrageously expensive and gratuitous equipment we require you to purchase to attend this school. You dont want your family to starve do you? So please enter! Speaking from experience, casualties are frequent and amusing.' >"Lastly I need to address the elephant in the room, or rather the snake in the room. I personally distrust and loathe the members of the Slytherin House, and as such, if Slytherin wins the House Cup through effort and hard work, I will overthrow the result by giving arbitrary points to whatever house I feel like" >As the students get out of their seats and scramble out of the main hall, Dumbledoor looks across the teachers table with a mocking grin >"Severus, see me at my office immediately. We need to discuss your Lily-cuckold situation" Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:04:27 No.135389095 ▶ >>135389213 >>135389270 >>135389416 >>135389435 >>135389671 >>135389707 >>135389761 >>135389772 >>135390108 >>135390157 >>135390590 >>135390926 >>135390954 >>135391110 >>135391287 >>135392027 >>135392436 >>135393511 >>135394226 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135394569 >>135394763 >>135396458 >>135397014 Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:06:58 No.135389169 ► >>135394959 >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:18:46 No.135389449 Did their parents have to sign release forms? Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:20:27 No.135389493 ► >>135390787 unironically this is exactly how I imagine a powerful wizard would behave Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)02:21:43 No.135389531 ▸ File: 1592451439150.gif (1.57 MB, 500x251) >mfw dumbledore imperius cursed a harem of underaged witches and filmed them again >mfw dumbledore spiked everyone's drinks with veratiserum over christmas Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:03:14 No.135390487 ► >>135390580 >>135390640 >>135390662 >>135390695 >>135391577 >>135392213 >>135393209 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135396458 File: 1592129573743.png (1.56 MB, 1600x667) >Also children I would like to let you know that for my own amusement I have hired a squib to clean the school despite the fact that magic would make this a trivial task for anyone else /tv/SPOILERS For disturbing images. www.4chan.org >Feel free to curse him as much as you would like as he cannot defend himself. >Also I have another anouncement >Notorious criminal Sirius Black has broken free from prison, so to ensure your safety we have littered the school grounds with demons that suck out people's souls and eat happiness >That will be all, have a nice year Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:05:19 No.135390532 ► >>135394951 I wonder if there is a market for really attractive people to sell bits of their hair for polyjuice potion. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:07:11 No.135390577 >>135390761 >>135390821 >>135390850 >>135391122 >>135391703 >>135393133 >>135393255 >>135394363 >>135394512 File: Lipetit.png (522 KB, 646x463) Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:07:40 No.135390590 File: Spoiler Image (25 KB, 360x450) >Children you may notice my pet m----- has died. He has been replaced by another, whom I procured at no small expense. >You will address Mr. Davis as Professor Lipetit from now on. We will pretend he is the same m----- I previously owned. If any aurors show up and ask what happened we will say Professor Lipetit merely charmed himself to appear younger. >The Professor will be seated next to Hagger, as the discrepancy in the sizes of these two freaks amuses me greatly. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:10:09 No.135390640 ► >>135389095 (OP) >One final thing students, and listen closely >Any student caught practicing BLACK magic >turns and looks directly at pic related >will be punished severely >N------.. ah I mean BLACK magic should be reported immediately and they will be lynched.. ah I mean expelled. >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:11:08 No.135390662 >>135391465 >>135390487 >we also have a number of elves we keep as willing slaves. >feel free to gawk and point at their grotesque appearance and perhaps laugh if you must. >*stares down the grainger bitch* >>135394853 >>135390487 >Notorious criminal Sirius Black has broken free from prison, so to ensure your safety we have littered the school grounds with demons that suck out people's souls and eat happiness >Also, he was a good friend >under no circumstances will you attempt to organize a slave revolt. >it ended poorly for the elves last time, but hagrid was well fed for weeks afterwards >oh, and due to avian flu concerns, the owl rookery...yes the one full droppings is off limits and all delivery owls are to be culled at once. >now...let the feast begin! Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:14:17 No.135390737 ► someone post the pasta about Dumbledore hanging trannies or something Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:14:06 No.135390731 >>135390846 >>135390879 >>135391173 >>135391249 >>135391613 >>135392063 >>135392218 >>135392469 >>135393209 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135394724 >>135395032 >>135396458 File: 1592442603910.png (470 KB, 524x522) >Dumbledore is peacefully working in his office >Suddenly the door opens >In walks an African student wearing the proud black and red robes of Gryffindor, a symbol of a racially equal wizard society >Dumbledore shrieks in terror and goes for his wand, points it at the intruder and screams RIDDIKULUS >Dumbledore breathes a side of his relief as the bogart retreats back into the castle Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:32:12 No.135391110 ► File: 1553704332113.jpg (75 KB, 586x580) Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)06:16:39 No.135394512 File: 1561662063818m.jpg (22 KB, 332x1024) >>135390731 >>135390577 >>135390487 >>135389095 (OP) >>135389095 (OP) >It is such because I decided to hide an extremely dangerous and powerful artifact at this institution for children. >Speaking from experience, casualties are frequent and amusing. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)06:17:00 No.135394520 File: vernkino2.jpg (118 KB, 496x635) >>135394428 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)06:27:48 No.135394713 ► >>135394730 >>135394833 >>135394975 >NO RONALD, I WILL NOT START CALLING YOU RHONDA, HOGWARTS WILL NOT STAND BY SUCH DEGENERACY! YOU WERE BORN A MAN AND A MAN YOU WILL STAY! CRUCIO! MAYBE THAT WILL TEACH YOU! Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)06:10:12 No.135394363 File: 1590781332524.jpg (33 KB, 493x386) >>135392619 >>135392965 >>135393013 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:42:09 No.135392639 ► >>135392662 File: 1523676910833.png (142 KB, 359x363) E Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fr)04:46:10 No. 135392704 ► File: 1.png (298 KB, 524x522) >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:43:39 No.135392662 File: Minase.jpg (52 KB, 640x480) >>135392639 Delete this >>135389095 (OP) >>135390487 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)05:13:37 No.135393293 File: 1571707200431.jpg (113 KB, 990x990) >>135390577 >>135390731 >>135392004 >>135392027 RIDDIKULUS >N------.. ah I mean BLACK m BLACK magic RIDDIKULUS >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)05:08:39 No.135393190 ► File: 1591391119923.gif (1.07 MB, 150x200) >>135393356 >>135395230 >>135395883 >Yes, I said his name. I am not scared for my life, but you should be. >>135392577 >You will never be a teenager locked in a school all year with other horny people your age with access to magic and potions that can make any fantasy come true. / 338 / 85 if youre a girl and you use polyjuice to transform into another girl and have sex while transformed, do you keep your hymen? Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:44:45 No.135392681 ► File: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HHHHHH.jpg (49 KB, 500x354) >>135392619 >HARRY F------ POTTER DID YOU WRITE "ALL LIVES MATTER" ON THE WALLS OF THE THIRD FLOOR CORRIDOR WITH THE BLOOD OF MR FILCHS CAT! >THE MUGGLES IN HOGSMEADE HAVE STARTED RIOTING! THEY'RE ON THEIR WAY NOW TO TEAR DOWN THE STATUE OF GODRIC GRYFFINDOR HIMSELF! >PANDEMONIUM! BLASPHEMY! >OH YOU THINK ITS FUNNY DO YOU? WELL IT WOULD BEMUSE YOU TO KNOW THAT YOUR FRIEND MS GRANGER HAS BEEN MISSING ALL DAY. THEY'RE PROBABLY DEFILING ALL HER HOLES AS WE SPEAK! I DON'T NEED TO REMIND YOU HOW MUGGLES LUST AFTER OUR WOMEN DO I? >YOU KNOW SOMETIMES I CAN REALLY SEE WHERE TOM WAS COMING FROM, I REALLY DO. ALAS ITS COME TO THIS. GRAB YOUR F------ WAND AND PUT THIS POINTY HOOD ON. WE MUST SECURE THE EXISTENCE OF OUR PEOPLE AND A FUTURE FOR MAGICAL CHILDREN. >HEIL GODRIC! >he said calmly

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External References

[1] Wikipedia – Harry Potter

[2] Goodreads – Harry Potter Series

[3] Wikipedia – Politics of Harry Potter

[4] Wikipedia – J.K. Rowling On Trans Rights

[5] /tv/ – Thread marking the main start to Dumbledore-posting

[6] Youtube – Wizard People, Dear Reader

[7] Reddit – Stretched His Legs

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Dumbledore-posting

Dumbledore-posting

Part of a series on Harry Potter. [View Related Entries]

Updated Jan 05, 2023 at 06:29PM EST by sakshi.

Added Jan 04, 2023 at 01:40PM EST by chausies.

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About

Dumbledore-posting refers to posts, greentexts and copypastas that parody Dumbledore's character from the fantasy book series Harry Potter by author J. K. Rowling. Common themes in Dumbledore -posting style parodies include how all Slytherins are depicted as evil, Dumbledore's favoritism towards Gryffindor, and author J. K. Rowling's in-book treatment of minorities and her real-life opinions on transgender rights. Common phrases include "he said calmly", as well as "Well done ______, well done. HOWEVER".

Origin

J.K. Rowling's seven-part Harry Potter was serialized between the years 1997 and 2007, and was adapted into an eight-part film series by Warner Bros between 2001 and 2011.[1] The books and movies have been generally well-received over the years, and are considered a modern children's classic.[2] The series has also been criticized over the years for its rigid moralism, its stereotypical depictions of minority characters, and various plotholes revolving around the "rules" of the magical world.[3] Rowling has been criticized her her opinions on transgender rights over the years as well.[4]

The earliest known instance of Dumbledore posting was uploaded to 4chan on June 6th, 2016, when a user began a threat with an image of Dumbledore alongside text impersonating his style of speaking. The post read, "Yes yes Well done Slytherin. Well done Slytherin. >However" (seen below).[5] This is referencing the iconic scene at the end of the first movie, where Slytherin was poised to win the house cup, but Dumbledore swooped in and gave points to Gryffindor instead.


59KiB, 768x576, hp15.jpg Anonymous 6 years and 210 days ago No.70537106 Quoted By: >>70537254 >>70538173 >>70538211 >>705400 >>70554666 >>70555611 >>70561138 >>70562053 Yes Yes Well done Slytherin. Well done Slytherin. >However

Spread

The aforementioned thread also contained a copypasta from " "Wizard People, Dear Reader"[6] that continued to parody Dumbledore's speech (seen below).


germanwings Anonymous 6 years and 210 days ago No.70539209 Report Quoted By: >>70539371 >>70539932 >>70540561 >>70540592 >>70541279 >>70541342 >>70543029 >>70544005 >>70546102 >>70546411 >>70546628 >>70553243 >>70553605 >>70553736 >>70555662 >>70555780 HAMMED The cafeteria is a crazed sea of almost-vacationing students. The only thing that stands between the kids and summer vacati on is Hardcastle McCormick's hokey points awards show. Dumbledore laments that yet another year has passed and he is e ven closer to his end, but soon commences in the announcing of the points. Gryffindor has a measly 312 points. The students' morale is very low at this fart of a total. Hufferpuffer has 420 points, and that's pretty good for the remedial class that they are. Viacom, well, this year Viacom has earned 480 points. And Slytherin, Slytherin has an even 6,000 points. Coming in first for the first time in front of Gryffindor, Slytherin seem to be the champions. 'However', Dumbledore says, 'last minute points are thus.' Snake is seemingly on the edge of her seat. 'To the Wretched Harmony, for aiding some unmentioned titans and knowing your spells in desperate times, you are awarded 300 points.' Everyone claps, and Harmony feels like she could cry out a second self of tears so that she could have someone to hug. She feels accepted, thou gh. 'Ronnie the Bear. Ronnie the Bear Weasel, you are bravery, you are courage, you are chess. One thousand points!' The applause begins to increa se, as if they know who is to be honoured next and they are just getting ready. 'And of course, the keeper of our hearts, and the true magician who has bewitched us all, Harry Potter, receives six million points for vanquishing t he Dracula!' The crowd goes a------, clapping their asses off in a mixture of admiration for Harry and excitement for f------ summer-time to finally get here. Th e new points mean that Gryffindor are now the champs of the year. They get to hold the trophy and drink from it whatever they wish. The entire cafeteria, Mouthoil, Snake, and Pitstains included, join in supporting Harry and summer-time. The applause is gigantic. The universe onl y accepts love today, and, luckily, everyone is in accordance.

Another popular Dumbledore-posting trend follows the format, "Well done _____, HOWEVER." The post is often accompanied by a picture of Dumbledore. Other versions of Dumbledore-posting reference the Dumbledore said calmly meme, portraying him screaming and acting unhinged, followed by the ironic phrase "he said calmly". As a nod to Dumbledore's association with the wizard-supremacist Grindelwald as well as Rowling herself, the posts also often portray Dumbledore as a bigot (seen below).


: Anonymous 09/11/19(Wed)15:22:13 No.120865979 59C4689A-C4A6-4670-A2FB-EF7DA6DF7B47.png 1.14 MB PNG >ONE POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EACH JEW KILLED IN THE HOLOCAUST >Draco and the kids start cheering >Gandalf looks at the screen >ZERO POINTS! File: dumble f--.jpg (80 KB, 899x470) Based Potter? Anonymous (ID: +xtovYTG) 01/03/23 (Tue)06:44:06 No.410702226 >>410704399 >>410706763 >>410707637 "Harry Potter!?!? What have you been doing in the Gas Chamber of Secrets? Why is there an amazon delivery of large ovens? And where TF have all the bank goblins gone!?!," Dumbledore whispered inaudibly, shaking the foundations of heaven and earth. "It wasn't me headmaster. I promise." Harry said, rather r*tardedly. "I will blame Slatherine then. 6 million points to Griffindoor!"

Other phrases utilized in Dumbledore-posting include the word "non-plussed" and the phrase "stretched his legs," which critics have noted to have been overused in the books (seen below).[7]


Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)05:16:46 No.592339286 >>592340025 >>592349607 >>592355112 >>592361079 >>592364302 >>592367412 >>592368863 >>592369286 >>592373847 >>592376556 >>592377124 >>592378657 >>592380217 >>592380718 >>592386813 >>592393138 >>592400338 >>592401207 >>592402007 1644619646869.png (858 KB, 830x664) google yandex iqdb wait >>592338610 >"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRYYY POO000000000|||||||||| TITTEEEERRRR", Dumbledore roared calmy with the wrath of a thousand suns >"FIRST YOU PUT YOUR NAME AS "HARRIETTA" IN THE GOBLET OF FIYA, THEN YOU USED HERMIONE'S HAIR TO MAKE A POLYJUICE POTION AND LET ALL THOSE SLYTHERIN S---- RUN A TRAIN ON YOU, NOW I CATCH YOU PLAYING A FEMALE CHARACTER?" >Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face >YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR YOU FOUR EYED LITTLE S---! I HAD HOPED IT WOULDN'T HAVE TO COME TO THIS, BUT YOU'VE LEFT ME WITH NO OTHER CHOICE! >YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! >suddenly a noose dropped down from the ceiling and wrapped around Harry's neck before being hoisted back up >"41 BILLION POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR" Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)07:47:43 No.592355112 ✓ 1622208435494.jpg (906 KB, 2544x4000) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:08:00 No.592373847 ✓ >>592339286 This is the first time 41% memes were funny for me in a while Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)12:26:58 No.592380217 ✓ 1618498608350.jpg (94 KB, 600x600) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >>Dumbledore rapidly stretched his legs up to Harry's face 929bb62f9f38f5059770a54c5988048a848356c9.jpg 160 KB JPG >Yes, yes, well done Hufflepuff, well done. However, recent events must be taken into account. And I have a few last minute points to award. {The Gryffindor students look up.} ToMissHermione Granger, for the use of cool intellect against discord trannies, 50 points. {Applause.} >Harry: (Pats) Good job. >Dumbledore: Second, toMr.Ronald Weasley, for tweeting "transwomen aren't people, let alone women" (Ronlooks atHarryand mouths, 'Me?'Harrynods, and mouths, "You!"} ..50 points. (Applause) And third, toMr. Harry Potter, for casting "reparo" on the crotch of every trans student you came across, I award Gryffindor house 60 points. (Immense cheering.) >Hermione: We're tied with Hufflepuff! >Dumbledore: And finally, it takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to stand up to your friends. I award 10 points toJK Rowling! >{The castle erupted in cheers) >Dumbledore: which means, I think, we are need of a change of decoration! Anonymous 03/18/22 (Fri)08:50:00 No.592361079 ✓ | Anonymous 03/18/22 (Fri) 14:03:56 No.592386813 ✓ 1646425708020.gif (515 KB, 510x510) google yandex | lol.gif (3.4 MB, 588x588) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 >Dumbledore clapped twice. Ropes appeared around 40% of the hufflepuffs' throats, then swiftly hoisted them up in place of the banners. Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:47:33 No.592377124 ✓ 1462069005593.png (145 KB, 300x297) google yandex iqdb wait >>592339286 Jesus Christ put me in the screen cap! Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri) 10:16:35 No.592369286 ✓ 1646003077541.jpg (27 KB, 325x331) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)06:27:05 No.592347107 >>592348672 >>592348897 >>592349607 >>592376652 >>592380785 >>592384087 1647385610773.jpg (319 KB, 768x1564) google yandex iqdb wait >>592335921 (OP) >YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! f------ lost Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)06:43:26 No.592348897 ✓ 1645311778047.gif (1.49 MB, 420x279) google yandex iqdb wait AW >>592347107 >casting "reparo" on the crotch of every trans student you came across My sides. >>592348672 Join the 51% of course. >>592339286 why is calmposting the funniest f------ thing to me? this s--- gets me every time, especially when there's some d------- spell thrown in there Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)13:22:48 No.592384087 >>592390639 >>592401652 >>592347197 https://voca.ro/163MfCndNtcW (embed) 5 minutes in audacity >>592339286 >>YUWINEVERUS BIYAWOMUNIS! I've prepared a special gift for Slytherin https://vocaroo.com/nUt57wURU0C (embed) >>suddenly a noose dropped down from the ceiling and wrapped around Harry's neck before being hoisted back up >>"41 BILLION POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR" Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)11:40:26 No. 1634770626733.jpg (40 KB, 524x228 YUNDAN >>592339286 F------ kek >>592385384 lost my s--- at the ending AEW WRESTLING Get Captcha Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)13:41:47 No.592385384>>592385921 >>592400534 >>592400924 >>592401245 1601007106521.jpg (42 KB, 644x390) google yandex iqdb wait YUNBAU Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)07:30:06 No.592353436 >>592353675 >>592353873 >>592354013 >>592355365 >>592360498 >>592378706 >>592379253 >>592383362 >>592390636 1634982221640.jpg (126 KB, 769x530) google yandex iqdb wait A TYPE THE CAPTCHA HERE TNT >Turn to page 394 >Trannies? >But sir we've just been learning about mild ADHD and OCD, We're not meant to be starting advanced deviancies like Transgenders and Groomers for weeks? >Quiet, Now who can tell me the difference Between an woman and a t-----? >A t----- is someone who tries but ultimately fails to become a real XX chromosome woman. A woman, HOWEVER, has no choice, with each full moon she menstruates and is capable of pregnancy >That's the second time you've spoken out of turn miss Granger 10 points from Gryffindor, now homework on my desk by Monday morning two pages on trannies and how to recognise them actually you don't need to because they never pass Anonymous 03/18/22(Fri)17:57:06 No.592400924 ✓ 1620387177395.jpg (33 KB, 578x419) google yandex iqdb wait

Various Examples


: Anonymous 07/19/21(Mon)19:50:32 No.153846558 1624203821204.jpg| 126 KB JPG SILENCE! SILENCE! I SAID FUUUUCKING SILENCE!!! I WON'T BE OUTSHOUTED BY A HOUSE OF F------ LOSERS! NEGATIVE 500,000 POINTS TO SLYTHERIN! HOW'D YOU LIKE THAT YOU F------ MONGRELS, YEAH YOU LIKE THAT!??! SHUT UP! SHUT THE F--- UP! YOU DON'T GET TO WIN! I CHOOSE WHO WINS THE HOUSE CUP, ALLL THOSE POINTS YOU AQUIRED THROUGHOUT THE YEAR MEAN F--- ALL! GRYFFINDOR WINS! GRYFFINDOR WINS!!! F--- YOU SLYTHERIN! 6 MILLIONS POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR, BECAUSE I F------ SAID SO!! MR. FILTCH ESCORT EVERY SNIVELING SLYTHERIN STUDENT TO THE DUNGEONS AND HAVE THEM SEPARATED BY PENIS SIZE AND VAGINAL INTEGRITY, I'LL BE VISITING A LITTLE LATER. YOU HEAR THAT SLYTHERINS, I'M GONNA F--- EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU, MAYBE YOU CAN EARN SOME POINTS BACK IF YOU'RE WILLING TO SWALLOW SOME OF MY HEADMASTER LOAD! NOW MR. FILTCH GET THESE MONGRELS OUT OF HERE!! NO000000OWWW! Anonymous 1 year and 37 days ago No.159793842 Report >Harry, did I ever tell you about our Gamekeeper, Rubeus Hagrid? He used to be a student at Hogwarts, just like you, until he was expelled fo r sicking his pet spider on a mudblo- I mean, muggle-born student 50 y ears ago. I knew he was innocent but I stood by and said nothing when they snapped his wand and sent him home. I suspected that Tom Riddl e was the real culprit, but again I said nothing. Anyway his innocence w as never proven, so I hired him as as a teacher lol. He was later responsible for a hyp ogriff mauling a student on his first day on the job, but was a filthy Slytherin so it wa s all peachy. One day students started being attacked in the school again and the Min istry suspected it was the guy who did it last time *snicker* and they came to arrest hi m and send him to Azkaban? You're familiar with Azkaban right? It's the most horrific place on Earth they send bad wizards to be locked up and tortured by having their so uls sucked out by flying demons, s--- is f------ terrifying. Anyway they sent Hagrid th ere and I just stood and watched again. I could have stopped them, but I didn't. Also I think he got r---- by a giant or whatever. He was a good friend. Anonymous Sat 03 Sep 2022 01:54:54 No.610981826 Report Quoted By: >>610982357 >>610983790 >>610983929 >>610984313 >>610984508 >>610984748 >>610985524 >>610986396 >>610986767 >>610990138 >>610990269 >"HARRRRRYYYY POTTTTTEERRRRR DID YOU PUT FEMALE PRONOUNS IN THE GOBLET OF BRIDGET" Dumbledore pondered aloud calmly. >"N-no sir, that was the trannies in hufflepuff sir" said Harry in a quivering voice,deathly afraid of the half naked headmaster standing before holding a dakimakura of bridget from guilty gear, "But I don't see the problem honestly, now that shes a girl its not gay to fa..." >"GIRL? T---? GAY, POTTER? YOU THINK I FAP TO BRIDGET BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE A GIRL, POTTER? ITS BECAUSE HE'S A FAILED MAN! THERES NOTHING MORE HOTTER THAN C------ INSIDE A MIND-BROKEN BOY WHO LOOKS LIKE HE STOLE HIS ENTIRE WARDROBE FROM A NEARBY CONVENT." >"But, sir", Harry said as he deigned to stretch the legs of reason to the rabid headmaster "Aren't trannies and femboys both the same flavour of mental illness?" >Harry had little to no time to prepare as the headmaster struck him across the face with the dakimakura he was holding, causing naive student to fall to the ground, and the subsequent stretching of the legs as the Dumbledore stomped on Harry's face repeatedly, calmly. >"ITS JUST DIFFERENT, POTTER! IVE ALWAYS BEEN GAY FOR BRIDGET, POTTER! GRINDLEWALD USED TO DRESS UP AS HIM JUST FOR ME POTTER, AND WOULD DO WONDERFUL THINGS WITH A YOYO AND A BIKELOCK TO MY ANUS. TRANNIES ARE ABOMINATIONS, BRIDGET IS MY OTONOKO. YOU KNOW WHAT OTONOKO MEANS POTTER? IT MEANS BOYWIFE. BRIDGET WAS MY BOYWIFE, POTTER. AND THE TRANNIES TOOK HIM AWAY FROM ME! NO MORE!" >Dumbledore stopped his calm onslaught upon Harry's fragile frame, and handed him a pistol. >"here you go, Potter. You've always had the chud phenotype, with the glasses and the jewish actor and whatnot. I need you to take this gun and shoot up the hufflepuff common room. For my sake. Make sure to scream something about "heil jk rowling 1488" to divert attention from myself. Off you go. 45 points to gryffindor" Anonymous Sun 12 Jul 2020 02:35:40 No.516597187 Quoted By: >>516597310 >>516597609 >>516597852 >>516597957 >>516600174 >>516600879 >>516601809 >>516602434 >Hermione: He called me a t-----. >Hagrid: He did not! >Harry: What's a t-----? >Hermione: It means transvestite. T----- is a really foul name for someone who's born in the wrong body. Someone who doesn't have the proper genitals. Someone like me. It's not a term one usually hears in civilized conversation. >Hagrid: See the thing is, Harry, there's some Terfs, like the Rowling family, who think they're better than everyone else because they're what people call "real women." >Harry: That's horrible! >Ron: [stretched his legs to burp up another slug] It's disgusting. >Hagrid: And it's codswallop to boot. "real women." Why, there isn't a person alive today who hasn't wanked it to a ladyboy at one time or another. More to the point, they've yet to come up with a bathroom our Hermione couldn't get into. Come 'ere. Don't you think on it, Hermione. Don't you think on it for one minute. [Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] File: 1579177888545.png (916 KB, 760x573) >he said calmly >"Welcome students, welcome to another year here at Hogwarts. To our First Years I have a few notices I wish to announce. An unmarked, random room in this castle will kill anyone entering it. It is such because I decided to hide an extremely dangerous and powerful artifact at this institution for children. Please also note that if you enter the schools forest, it will be a very painful and certain death from the dozens of ferocious creatures roaming it." >"Despite being the safest place in the world for wizards, there is a coin flips chance that one my employees this year is on first-name basis with the most evil wizard in living memory. I am of course speaking of VOLDEMORT. Yes, I said his name. I am not scared for my life, but you should be. Which one is it this year? Personally, my bet is on professor Snape." >"I am also pleased to announce that the quinquennial Death Tournament will be held this year. The three underage contestant will endure three deadly trials for no other reason than my personal amusement. I encourage anyone from monetarily struggling families to enter so that you can recover from the outrageously expensive and gratuitous equipment we require you to purchase to attend this school. You dont want your family to starve do you? So please enter! Speaking from experience, casualties are frequent and amusing.' >"Lastly I need to address the elephant in the room, or rather the snake in the room. I personally distrust and loathe the members of the Slytherin House, and as such, if Slytherin wins the House Cup through effort and hard work, I will overthrow the result by giving arbitrary points to whatever house I feel like" >As the students get out of their seats and scramble out of the main hall, Dumbledoor looks across the teachers table with a mocking grin >"Severus, see me at my office immediately. We need to discuss your Lily-cuckold situation" Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:04:27 No.135389095 ▶ >>135389213 >>135389270 >>135389416 >>135389435 >>135389671 >>135389707 >>135389761 >>135389772 >>135390108 >>135390157 >>135390590 >>135390926 >>135390954 >>135391110 >>135391287 >>135392027 >>135392436 >>135393511 >>135394226 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135394569 >>135394763 >>135396458 >>135397014 Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:06:58 No.135389169 ► >>135394959 >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:18:46 No.135389449 Did their parents have to sign release forms? Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:20:27 No.135389493 ► >>135390787 unironically this is exactly how I imagine a powerful wizard would behave Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)02:21:43 No.135389531 ▸ File: 1592451439150.gif (1.57 MB, 500x251) >mfw dumbledore imperius cursed a harem of underaged witches and filmed them again >mfw dumbledore spiked everyone's drinks with veratiserum over christmas Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:03:14 No.135390487 ► >>135390580 >>135390640 >>135390662 >>135390695 >>135391577 >>135392213 >>135393209 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135396458 File: 1592129573743.png (1.56 MB, 1600x667) >Also children I would like to let you know that for my own amusement I have hired a squib to clean the school despite the fact that magic would make this a trivial task for anyone else /tv/SPOILERS For disturbing images. www.4chan.org >Feel free to curse him as much as you would like as he cannot defend himself. >Also I have another anouncement >Notorious criminal Sirius Black has broken free from prison, so to ensure your safety we have littered the school grounds with demons that suck out people's souls and eat happiness >That will be all, have a nice year Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:05:19 No.135390532 ► >>135394951 I wonder if there is a market for really attractive people to sell bits of their hair for polyjuice potion. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:07:11 No.135390577 >>135390761 >>135390821 >>135390850 >>135391122 >>135391703 >>135393133 >>135393255 >>135394363 >>135394512 File: Lipetit.png (522 KB, 646x463) Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:07:40 No.135390590 File: Spoiler Image (25 KB, 360x450) >Children you may notice my pet m----- has died. He has been replaced by another, whom I procured at no small expense. >You will address Mr. Davis as Professor Lipetit from now on. We will pretend he is the same m----- I previously owned. If any aurors show up and ask what happened we will say Professor Lipetit merely charmed himself to appear younger. >The Professor will be seated next to Hagger, as the discrepancy in the sizes of these two freaks amuses me greatly. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:10:09 No.135390640 ► >>135389095 (OP) >One final thing students, and listen closely >Any student caught practicing BLACK magic >turns and looks directly at pic related >will be punished severely >N------.. ah I mean BLACK magic should be reported immediately and they will be lynched.. ah I mean expelled. >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:11:08 No.135390662 >>135391465 >>135390487 >we also have a number of elves we keep as willing slaves. >feel free to gawk and point at their grotesque appearance and perhaps laugh if you must. >*stares down the grainger bitch* >>135394853 >>135390487 >Notorious criminal Sirius Black has broken free from prison, so to ensure your safety we have littered the school grounds with demons that suck out people's souls and eat happiness >Also, he was a good friend >under no circumstances will you attempt to organize a slave revolt. >it ended poorly for the elves last time, but hagrid was well fed for weeks afterwards >oh, and due to avian flu concerns, the owl rookery...yes the one full droppings is off limits and all delivery owls are to be culled at once. >now...let the feast begin! Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:14:17 No.135390737 ► someone post the pasta about Dumbledore hanging trannies or something Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:14:06 No.135390731 >>135390846 >>135390879 >>135391173 >>135391249 >>135391613 >>135392063 >>135392218 >>135392469 >>135393209 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135394724 >>135395032 >>135396458 File: 1592442603910.png (470 KB, 524x522) >Dumbledore is peacefully working in his office >Suddenly the door opens >In walks an African student wearing the proud black and red robes of Gryffindor, a symbol of a racially equal wizard society >Dumbledore shrieks in terror and goes for his wand, points it at the intruder and screams RIDDIKULUS >Dumbledore breathes a side of his relief as the bogart retreats back into the castle Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:32:12 No.135391110 ► File: 1553704332113.jpg (75 KB, 586x580) Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)06:16:39 No.135394512 File: 1561662063818m.jpg (22 KB, 332x1024) >>135390731 >>135390577 >>135390487 >>135389095 (OP) >>135389095 (OP) >It is such because I decided to hide an extremely dangerous and powerful artifact at this institution for children. >Speaking from experience, casualties are frequent and amusing. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)06:17:00 No.135394520 File: vernkino2.jpg (118 KB, 496x635) >>135394428 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)06:27:48 No.135394713 ► >>135394730 >>135394833 >>135394975 >NO RONALD, I WILL NOT START CALLING YOU RHONDA, HOGWARTS WILL NOT STAND BY SUCH DEGENERACY! YOU WERE BORN A MAN AND A MAN YOU WILL STAY! CRUCIO! MAYBE THAT WILL TEACH YOU! Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)06:10:12 No.135394363 File: 1590781332524.jpg (33 KB, 493x386) >>135392619 >>135392965 >>135393013 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:42:09 No.135392639 ► >>135392662 File: 1523676910833.png (142 KB, 359x363) E Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fr)04:46:10 No. 135392704 ► File: 1.png (298 KB, 524x522) >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:43:39 No.135392662 File: Minase.jpg (52 KB, 640x480) >>135392639 Delete this >>135389095 (OP) >>135390487 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)05:13:37 No.135393293 File: 1571707200431.jpg (113 KB, 990x990) >>135390577 >>135390731 >>135392004 >>135392027 RIDDIKULUS >N------.. ah I mean BLACK m BLACK magic RIDDIKULUS >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)05:08:39 No.135393190 ► File: 1591391119923.gif (1.07 MB, 150x200) >>135393356 >>135395230 >>135395883 >Yes, I said his name. I am not scared for my life, but you should be. >>135392577 >You will never be a teenager locked in a school all year with other horny people your age with access to magic and potions that can make any fantasy come true. / 338 / 85 if youre a girl and you use polyjuice to transform into another girl and have sex while transformed, do you keep your hymen? Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:44:45 No.135392681 ► File: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HHHHHH.jpg (49 KB, 500x354) >>135392619 >HARRY F------ POTTER DID YOU WRITE "ALL LIVES MATTER" ON THE WALLS OF THE THIRD FLOOR CORRIDOR WITH THE BLOOD OF MR FILCHS CAT! >THE MUGGLES IN HOGSMEADE HAVE STARTED RIOTING! THEY'RE ON THEIR WAY NOW TO TEAR DOWN THE STATUE OF GODRIC GRYFFINDOR HIMSELF! >PANDEMONIUM! BLASPHEMY! >OH YOU THINK ITS FUNNY DO YOU? WELL IT WOULD BEMUSE YOU TO KNOW THAT YOUR FRIEND MS GRANGER HAS BEEN MISSING ALL DAY. THEY'RE PROBABLY DEFILING ALL HER HOLES AS WE SPEAK! I DON'T NEED TO REMIND YOU HOW MUGGLES LUST AFTER OUR WOMEN DO I? >YOU KNOW SOMETIMES I CAN REALLY SEE WHERE TOM WAS COMING FROM, I REALLY DO. ALAS ITS COME TO THIS. GRAB YOUR F------ WAND AND PUT THIS POINTY HOOD ON. WE MUST SECURE THE EXISTENCE OF OUR PEOPLE AND A FUTURE FOR MAGICAL CHILDREN. >HEIL GODRIC! >he said calmly

Search Interest

External References

[1] Wikipedia – Harry Potter

[2] Goodreads – Harry Potter Series

[3] Wikipedia – Politics of Harry Potter

[4] Wikipedia – J.K. Rowling On Trans Rights

[5] /tv/ – Thread marking the main start to Dumbledore-posting

[6] Youtube – Wizard People, Dear Reader

[7] Reddit – Stretched His Legs

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Funny thing about J.K Rowling: before the transgenderism controversy she was pretty obviously a generically "woke" celebrity: saying that Trump was worse than Voldemort, posting pictures of black Swedish immigrants defying the far-right, saying that Hermione was black, etc. Then she disagreed with "the wokes" on one key issue and now everyone is pretending like she was always some secretly racist, anti-Semitic far right-author. The 'problematic' depictions of minorities in the books are honestly just due to ignorance and unfortunate coincidences rather than deliberate malice.

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