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hi would you like to donate $1 to charity today is it for, like.. dogs? ah no, its actually or children in need NOW IF IT WERE FOR DOGS I WOULDN'T HAVE ANY PROBLEM WITH WHAT, YOU DON'T HATE KIDS????? You' re aski no rne if i hate HOMELESS KIDS??? yo-its-matt TODAY IN RETAI next time you can just keep it at "no thanks" failsports Honestly it is quite hard to keep to ourselves how much we hate kids. yo-its-matt @failsports it really f----- isnt failsports @yo-its-matt apparently it's easier to do than all the people who complain that people don't like kids. This jerk of a woman was just doing her shopping to be fair. The problem here is charity mugging not disliking kids or not. "CHARITYMUGGING

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retail charity child haters

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fulgur-caligo-custodis kurlyfryz Power move: Next time you go to the airport, bring a bottle of shampoo, but it's filled with yogurt. When they tell you that liquids aren't allowed Drink it Posted in r/madlads by u/ProbablyM_S reddit

lesbianshepard Jul 24 travelling next week for work. googled the nearest city and none of you are prepared to see what passes for the local style pizza. lesbianshepard Jul 24 this should be a crime lesbianshepard Jul 25 #someone needs to die for this #divorced dad type food #is the local chef a 12 year old latchkey kid? #as a new yorker im about to k J elf #abolish all prisons except one for these guys #that is a crime where I'm from #I'm anti regional food variation shaming but this is a crime man #mamma mia. #i took like a deep shuddering breath #i feel nauseous. #oh no they should be shot #literally the closest thing to anti-Italian racism the reviews are in: Pennsylvania must pay for its crimes

theaccidentfactory Follow I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby theaccidentfactory English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking s about the neighbor's son

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I'll just say this: Imagine if Cartman was a girl. Would any of us like her?

lochnessmonster Why don't we get more women written in the "lovable a------" character type bojanglesrph because people call them "bitches" an-actual-lion He loves his tea

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"The idea that people have somehow become more absurd due to the existence of the internet never ceases to amuse me."

Why do 18th century Englieh paintinge have so many squirrels in them, and how did they tame them so that they wouldn't bite the painter? 10.76 Inquiry at desk.. Nov. 1948 Can I get a book telling me how to be mistress of ceremonies at a musical o---?" ariety within 5 minutes on telephone: Name of Napoleon's horse of opening of baaobail season in .Y. Date of opening of baseball season in N.Y. Books on human spontaneous combustion Who were the Seven Sutherland Sisters? Telephone call mid-afternoon New Year s Day, 1967: Somewhat uncertain female voice: "I have two questions. The first is sort of an etiquette one. I wentto a New Year's Eve party and unexpectedly stayed over. I don't really know the hosts. Ought I to send a thank-you note? Second, when you meet a fellow and you know he's worth twen- ty-seven million dollars because that's what they told me, twenty-seven illion, and you know his nationality, how do you find out his name?" as 1/2/67 hoodlock digg: This is what people asked the library before Google. (via) The idea that people have somehow become more absurd due to the existence of the internet will never cease to amuse me. I want to know the rest of the story of that lady who had the wild New Year's Eve.

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Because this is absolutely how sexual dimorphism works

ilots

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A tumblr page says a lot about a person

eiffeled A person's tumblr tells a lot about them. It shows what kind of images they see in their head, who they love, who they hate, even what they think about other people topherchris

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Beethoven's 9th symphony speedrun

Doug Mataconis @dmataconis That's not how this works That's not how any of this works. An orchestra of 120 players takes 40 minutes to play Beethoven's 9th Symphony. How long would it take for 60 players to play the symphony? 5. Let P be number of players and T the time playing. 5:06 PM 09 Oct 17 7,833 Retweets 13.4K Likes bitsow 4800 players, Beethoven's 9th Symphony Speedrun kaijuno its not even music anymore it's just a shockwave that kills you instantly

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Fuck everything I want to be a birb

thunderthighz biggest-gaudiest-patronuses adulthood is a scam i want to be a crow babylunapea I'm not even an adult and I want to be a crow biggest-gaudiest-patronuses The desperation only grows with years everythingunderthesky Be the crow you wish to see in the world -Collect Shiny Things -Hop happily down the street for no apparent reason Scream loudly when you see your friends biggest-gaudiest-patronuses What an incredibly inspiring addition thank you Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

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White people amirite

$33rofheart willfosho s33rofheart does a qualified white person want to explain to me what the f--- this means????????????? You see white people hibernate in square formation to protect their crops for winter. thanks

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4chan for women

dietmountainmadewka tumblr is just 4chan for women dietmountainmadewka I can elaborate: the cultures and site dynamics of 4chan and tumblr are heavily based on the social natures of men and women respectively: 4chan is all about anonymity, popularity is despised (such as with tripfags) as it is seen as undeserved "attention w------". They love to s--- on eachother and get in flamewars and arguments but ultimately share a sense comradery Discussions and posts in general are based around specific topics and hobbies usually revolving around external issues rather than personal ones Tumblr on the other hand is based heavily around popularity and social status Blogs will flaunt their follower count and reblogs. Much like women in real life people on tumblr will take any chance they can to boost their own popularity by calling out larger blogs for percieved slights or mistakes. Drama is the lifeblood of this website. Discussions usually revolve around personal feelings or situations, with specific topics simply being vehicles for personal drama Basically, 4chan is Fight Club and tumblr is Desperate Housewives

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unrealistic body standards smh

the-narwhal-orchestra orcadreams Source: nakedpastor ENTRY MENWOMEN Onakedpastorcon mysteryinc thisisrelatable shithappens-but-lifegoeson damn thats powerful one of my favorite posts here. this f------ pressure for men to be square shaped really pisses me off sometimes im glad that you all understand 283,477 notes

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A real eye-opener, this was. A great tool for any master of ceremonies headed down the road to heaven.

NSFW

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I guess I'll agree to the terms and service...

1 We've updated our privacy policy 4.254 notities

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Impeach everyone!

Jacob Wohl @JacobAWohl Right now, one person is worried about impeachment, and it's not President Trump #ImpeachObama 5/21/18, 6:41 PM 513 Retweets 1,380 Likes Jack Posobiec @JackPosobiec They will impeach Trump, we will impeach Obama. These are the stakes 4:13 PM-22 May 2018 maswartiz Did republicans forget Obama isn't President? There's like no way they know what the word impeachment means. WOwls Careful or we will get impeached too 50.655 notities

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Tumblr - Me, holding you at scanner-point in a dark alleyway Hello, sir/madam, would you like to donate to my cause today?

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hi would you like to donate $1 to charity today is it for, like.. dogs? ah no, its actually or children in need NOW IF IT WERE FOR DOGS I WOULDN'T HAVE ANY PROBLEM WITH WHAT, YOU DON'T HATE KIDS????? You' re aski no rne if i hate HOMELESS KIDS??? yo-its-matt TODAY IN RETAI next time you can just keep it at "no thanks" failsports Honestly it is quite hard to keep to ourselves how much we hate kids. yo-its-matt @failsports it really f----- isnt failsports @yo-its-matt apparently it's easier to do than all the people who complain that people don't like kids. This jerk of a woman was just doing her shopping to be fair. The problem here is charity mugging not disliking kids or not. "CHARITYMUGGING

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