Greetings! You must login or signup first!

What is the laziest thing you've ever done? I was once on a US military ship, having breakfast in the wardroom (officers lounge) when the Operations Officer (OPS) walks in. This guy was the definition of NOT a morning person; he's still half asleep, bleary eyed.. basically a zombie with a bagel. He sits down across from me to eat his bagel and is just barely conscious. My back is to the outboard side of the ship and the morning sun is blazing in one of the portholes putting a big bright-ass circle of light right on his barely conscious face He's squinting and chewing and basically just remembering how to be alive for today. It's painful to watch But then zombie-OPS stops chewing, slowly picks up the phone, and dials the bridge. In his well-known I'm-still-totally-asleep voice, he says "heeeey. It's OPS. Could you... shift our barpat... yeah, one six five. Thanks." And puts the phone down. And then he just sits there. Squinting. Waiting And then, ever so slowly, I realize that that big blazing spot of sun has begun to slide off the zombie's face and onto the wall behind him. After a moment it clears his face and he blinks slowly a few times and the brilliant beauty of what I've just witnessed begins to overwhelm me. By ordering the bridge to adjust the ship's back-and-forth patrol by about 15 degrees, he's changed our course just enough to reposition the sun off of his face. He's literally just redirected thousands of tons of steel and hundreds of people so that he could get the sun out of his eyes while he eats his bagel. I am in awe 0 He slowly picks up his bagel and for a moment I'm terrified at the thought that his own genius may escape him, that he may never appreciate the epic brilliance of his laziness (since he's not going to wake up for another hour). But between his next bites he pauses, looks at me, and gives me the faintest, sly grin, before returning to gnaw slowly on his zombie bagel senpatriarchy pryathis buck-nekkid badmecha007 annies-booobs not-pizza l My idol This will never not be funny. a hero for the ages Give this man a medal. Goals I read this every time l see it He deserves a NAM I will never not reblog. Get out.

+118

Brilliant laziness


Uploaded by Sir Trollsalot Mar 12, 2015 at 03:16PM EDT

Share Pin Download More

Origin Entry: Tumblr

File type: png

Resolution: (430px x 1069px)

File size: 283 KB


eesirachs Follow Dec 12, 2022 Anonymous asked: Can we escape god? eesirachs answered: no but he doesn't mind if you wriggle a little 5,272 notes D 3
sandersstudies That feeling when your body is requesting something but you're not sure what so you just start eating and drinking random stuff to try and figure it out sandersstudies Me, eating a chocolate waffle at 7pm: Is this what you desire, oh prison of flesh? queerglassescutie @Dope-A-Meme Meanwhile your body is like I need water
trinketbug Follow May 19 WHY IS A BIG MAC $11.99??? PASE ORDE HERE "furry inflation" (2024) 25.1K notes
View All 12,360 Images

Load 16 Comments

Moar:

Top Comments


+ Add a Comment

Comments (16)


Display Comments

Add a Comment


+ Add an Image

Image Details

5,694 views (5 from today)

Uploaded Mar 12, 2015 at 03:16PM EDT

Origin Entry

Tumblr

Tags

ship, military, story, lazy

Claim Authorship Edit History
Textile Embed
Kym

Know Your Meme

Like Page   1.8M likes