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Your task is simple:

Grant the wish made by the user above you, while at the same time corrupting it in whatever way you wish to make it different than what the previous user originally intended.

Afterwards, you make your own wish, which in turn will be corrupted by the next user.

For example:

USER A: I wish I had a million dollars.

USER B: Granted. You now have one million dollars.

In monopoly money.

I wish I had a steak.

USER C: Granted. It's made out of rubber.

I wish Batman was real.

Etc.

I'll start.

*ahem*

I wish I possessed an army with which I could conquer the world.

Granted, but your world is now the moon.

I wish my beard looked more manlier.

Granted, but your face is now covered.

I wish people would stop hating me.

Granted, but everyone is now afraid of you.

I wish I had magical powers.

Granted, but you burn down your house, kill hundreds of people with your magic, are arrested and sentenced to death, in an attempt to try to teleport your way to freedom, without knowing the proper spell, you rip your body to shreds and don't reassemble.

I wish I could learn without having to do hours of study.

Granted, but now you can only learn by eating human flesh to absorb knowledge.
I wish I could teleport.

Granted. You are now capable of teleportation, but only in ten inch increments. Teleportation is also taxing on your mental abilities, and you must take several minutes to recuperate or risk brain damage.

I wish I had artistic skill that rivaled that of Muumi.

Granted, you are now an obscure artist that no one has ever heard of. Your talent is the only ability you have and you starve for months trying to make a living off of charcoal sketches as you can't afford paint and canvas.

I wish I could read the minds of the people I talk to.

I wish I could stop time for certain lengths.

You gain the ability to stop time for 100 years or 1000 years your time. However, you still age while time is stopped, and you can't cancel the stop.

I wish for the ability to transform into whatever I want.

You took this from another site, didn't you?

Granted, you can now transform into anything PERMANENTLY.

I wish for bacon.

↑We had one about 3 years ago. Used to be one of my favorite threads.

Granted, It's soy bacon.

I wish for a Red Ryder carbine action two-hundred shot range model air rifle.

Granted, the bullets curve back to you.

I wish the next user wouldn't corrupt my wish.

Granted, but you cannot make any more wishes from now on.

I wish for a stick.

Granted, but It's not the stick you wanted.

I wish the Xbox One didn't suck.

ninja'd

Granted, the Xbox One is now a PS4.

I wish for a wish.

Granted, but it's corrupted.

I wish for a number.

You picked the number…
666!

I wish for nothing.

Granted; everything ceases to exist.

I wish YouTube abandoned Google+ and reverted to how things were prior to the +takeover.

@The Stare Master: There was another one from under a year ago when I was still new to the forums, which was where I got this idea.

Granted, YouTube reverts back to when Bieber had the highest views.

I wish for a Playstationboxii4 U One.

Granted, but it breaks down after a short while.

I wish people would stop wanting Christmas a month early.

Granted, but they now want it 11 months early.

I wish for lots of lasers.

granted but it is an tentacle alien booty call that lasts for 1000 years

i wish for sushi

Granted, but it's made out of dog penis and people from Pittsburgh's hair.

I wish I could fly.

you are a plane and you cant stop moving or you will crash
i wish for reality warping

Granted, the sushi is fine, but the fish are angry at you for eating them so undercooked and come out of the sea and spear you and feast on you as human sushi.

I wish for a pony.

..called "Filly Funtasia"

I wish for the end of the world.

Your wish ended up just being an insane guy that predicted the world would end. As usual.

I wish I could skateboard!

Granted, you break every bone in your body the first time you attempt to try a half-pipe.

I wish for five million dollars.

You wish for 5 million instead of 5 billion, and you can't revert.

I want to believe.

an UFO crashes on you
at least you believed.
i wish that i was a otter

Granted, but you can't swim.
I wish I had the powers of a god.

Granted, but turns out the Atheists were right and there's no god. You get nothing now.

I wish for a sandwich.

You wake up in a town in Kent, but you are still hungry.

I wish you would stop doing that.

granted

i wish for spaces

Right then, we will warp you somewhere between Neptune and Saturn.
I want a magical unicorn that can shoot rainbows out of it's armpits and then the rainbows barf candy.

You said "I want" instead of "I wish"

I wish to be a Jedi.

Granted. You are a padawan that Anakin kills.

I wish I was an INTERIOR CROCODILE ALLIGATOR, who DRIVES A CHEVROLET, MOVIE, THEATER.

Granted, you are now a G and get shot at.
I wish I could phase through materials on command just like a ghost.

Your powers a realized and you initiate the command to phase through the walls of the school girls changing room. You die a horrible death as every element in your body loses its mass and turns into neutrinos which Earth leaves behind in the depths of space. See you next year!

I wish for a pay raise.

Granted, but now you're the envy of your co-workers. They become so enraged that your boss chose you over them for who knows what reason like magic or something that they photoshop pictures of you and the bosses wife. You are fired on the spot, good luck trying to get another job Boss's wife fucker.

I wish I could feel.

Granted, but you're now just a giant hand.

I wish for Luigi to be the mascot of Nintendo.

Nintendo is now an adult-entertainment company and Luigi is their go to sexual mascot, he will do anything and everything to please any of his lovers (including Mario and all the other Nintendo characters). ANYTHING.

I wish for the MPAA and RIA to die horribly.

granted now people make any prono happen on the movies and economy is based offed of it

i wish twilight is banished

Granted, but sunrises and sunsets are no longer possible as a result.

I wish "gentlemen"

You get gentle women instead.

I wish I had the new Mario game Super Mario 3d World.

granted but it's pirated

i wish for 420 day

Granted, but everyone on earth dies because the earth is now 420°F.
At least you can cook frozen pizzas outside now.

I wish for all A's this semester.

Granted, but only when there is also a solar eclipse on that day and in your area.

I wish for a hug.

Granted, but now every day is agonizingly boring and every day is longer than usual.

I wish for Spongebob finally got his driver's licence.