FROM NOW ON, WE ARE TAKING A STATISTICAL APPROACH TO COMBAT FIRST, DONT GO FOR KILLS. GO FOR STABS SUCCESSFUL STABS AREMOST VALUABLE WARRIOR MUCH MORE VALUABLEBECAUSE HE KILLED THREE TO VICTORY THAN LETHAL STRIKES SEE SIEGWURST OVER HERE? EVERYONE THINKS HES OUR FRENCHMAN IN EACH OF THE LAST TEN BATTLES NOW LOOK AT IRK OVERHE ALONE ACCOUNTS 凵ERE HE AVERAGES Q2.1 FOR AN ADDITIONAL 3.8 WINS PER CAMPAIGN SEASON. SIEGWURST BRINGS IN 1.6 STABS PER BATTLE NOMOR READING THE SAGAS Aya NO SPIN MOVES OF ANY KIND/ THEYRE VERY IMPRESSIVE, BUT THE EXPECTED BUT REMEMBER WHENN SIEGWURST SLEW TWO COSSACKS WITHADDITIONAL WINS PER SPIN MOVE IS HIS 'DANCE OF NEGATIVE. NEGATIVE THE WHIRUNG BLADES? IN THIS ARMY, WE CARE ABOUT ONE THING, AND THATS STAB PERCENTAGE THIS IS GONNA HAVE SERIOUS NEGATIVE EFFECTS ON MORALE WHICH CORRELATES WITH EXACTUY NOTHING NOW GET STABBY! Smbc-comics.com

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Origin Entry: Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

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FASTER, PAPA, FASTER! HA! OKAY SWEET PEA! THIS IS THE BEST DAY! I'M GONNA REMEMBER THIS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! Later, it turned out the people in the comic were just pictures, without any past or any future. Less than dead, they never were.

"How come there are all these initial public offerings but never a final public offering?"

"Depending on which AI becomes Skynet, you might also be able to have a suit with banal political questions"

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Fantasy

MY DEEPEST DARKEST FANTASY IS FOR YOU TO FORCE YOURSELF UPON ME I DUNNO 2 ITS JUST PRETEND COME ON, ITLL BE FUN. THE SAFE WORD IS PINEAPPLE OKAY. TRY I MUST HAVE NAAAAAH I.. TLU 2 WHAT IS THIS? PINGAPPLE PINEAPPLe! POWDERED GLASS DID IT GET TOO REAU? ITGOT TOO REAL Smbc-comics.com

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Propaganda

WE NEED A WAY TO GET KIDS TO STOP FALLING FOR PROPAGANDA AND FAKE NEWS BUT WHAT CAN WE DO? WERE JUST A CANDY COMPANY SOON THE SMALLEST SIZE IS CALLED FUN SIZE? BY GOD You CAN'T TRUST THE POWERFUL GO00D G00000D smbc-comics.com

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Science Jokes

ALL SCIENCE JOKES RUINED HEY HEISENBERG! DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE AND HOW FAST YOU WERE GOING? YES, TO AN EXTREMELY HIGH DEGREE OF PRECISION HEY SCHRODINGER./ DID YOU KNOW THERES A DEAD CAT IN YOUR BOX? BUT THEN, THAT IS TRUE OF ANY BOX THAT HAS A CAT IN IT NOT UNTIL YOU LOOKED/ HEY, EINSTEIN/ DOES THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD OR DOES THE ROAD CROSS THE CHICKEN? THATS GAUILEAN RELATIVITY S----FOR-BRAINS Smbc-comics.com

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Clowns

YOU EVER WONDER WHY CLOWNS WERE INVENTEDP THEYRE OBJECTIVELY TERRIFYING. ALL KiDS TODAY ARE SCARED OF THEM, BUT THEY WERE ONCE A POPULAR FORM OF AMUSEMENT YEAH, SO WERE PUBLIC EXECUTIONS F WATCHING A GUY GET KILLED IS YOUR BASELINE FUN THING TO DO WITH AN AFTERNOON, GOTTEN EVER CUTER YOURE PROBABUY NOT TOO S THAT WE LACK TH CREEPED OUTBY SOMEBODY WITH FUNNY MAKEUP THE REASON KIDS SHOWS HAVE SALUTARY LESSON OF THE GUILLOTINE AND A RED NOSE F WE STARTED BEHEADING PEOPLE IN THE PUBLIC SQUARE EVERY DAY... CLOWNS WOULD RETURN? AND NOW YOU KNOW WHY YOU'RE SCARED OF THEM/ Smbc-comics.com

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Binary

WELL, WEVE ANAUYZED THE CHANGING LIGHT PATTERN, AND.. ITS BINARY FOR EAT S---, EARTH It was a negative moment in the search for exoplanets.

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Soonish 3

DO YOU WORRY ONLINE DATING SITES HAVE MADE US TOO PICKY? YOU CAN GET SO OBSESSED WITH TINY STUFF EVENTUALLY yOURE JUST ASKING FOR IMPOSSIBILITIES HM?) AND YOU SPEND YOUR LIFE ALONE LUKE, INSTEAD OF FUNDAMENTALS, PEOPLE FOCUS ON NARROW SPECIFICS I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOURE TAUKING ABOUT LIKES ENNIRONMENT LOOKING FOR: MAN OR ALISM LAWNCARE WOMAN WHO CAN EFFICIENTUY METABOLZE PURE CELLULOSE THIS COMIC BROUGHT TO YOU Smbc-comics.com CUCK FOR MORE INFORMATION.

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Dark

DADDY T'M AFRAID OF THE DARK! DON'T WORRY EVENTUALUY YOULLDARKNESS IN A BE DEAD AND YOULL HAVE NO SENSE ORGANS, NOR EXPERIENCED Y A ANY PERCENING THERE'S NO COFFIN. DARKNESS IS A SENSATION APIENT BEING MIND VACANT EYES SEE NOTHING, KIDDO/ MOMI HES DOING IT AGAIN/ ITS OKAY/ HELL BE DEAD ONE DAY/ Smbc-comics.com

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Ew

WHAT THE WAS THAT THERE WHEN WE LEFT NEW VORK?

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Prodigy

ONUY YOUNG PEOPLE DO REVOLUTIONARY MATHEMATICS O IS ANCIENT 15 1S OLD 10 IS MIDDLE-AGED THREE IS THIS MANY. TS COUNTER INTUITIVE, BUT WE MUST ACCEPT IT mbc-comics.com

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Pain

MASTER WHY DID YOU CREATE ME SURVIVAL SO THAT I FEEL PAIN? HUMANS ARE SOMETIMES BORN WITHOUT THE ABILUTY TO FEEL PAIN. THEY OFTEN DIE YOUNG BECAUSE THEY FAL TO NOTICE SERIOUS INJURIES, YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN THE SAME PAIN IS EVOLUTIONS RESPONSE O A UNIVERSE THAT HATES LIFE AND IS CONSTANTUY TRYING TO EXTINGUISH IT. IN SHORT YOU SHOULD BE MAD ABOUT EXISTENCE NOT SUFFERING OKAY, BUT WHY DID YOU CREATE ME TO FEEL EMOTIONAL PAIN?/ YOURE MORE RELATABLE THIS WAY Smbc-comics.com

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God Is Crying

GOD WHY DOES IT RAIN? WHY ARE YOU//BECAUSE RAIN MAKES ME SAD CRYING* BECAUSE IM CRYNGD BUT IF YOURE CRYING BECAUSE ITS RAINING BECAUSE YOURE CRYING, THEN.OH DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT SOON NOAH/ BUILD AN ARKI Smbc-comics.com

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Wholesale

F I TAKE A WHOLESALE QUANTITY OF SEX AND COMPANIONSHIP, CAN I GET A DISCOUNT ON THE TOTAL AMOUNT OF EFFORT I NEED TO EXPEND IN ACQUISITION? ARE YOU SAYING ARE YOU ASKING...NO! NO, YOU ARE NOT USING THOSE TERMS TO PROPO WILL YOU MARRY ME? Never date an economist.

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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Money Battle

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FROM NOW ON, WE ARE TAKING A STATISTICAL APPROACH TO COMBAT FIRST, DONT GO FOR KILLS. GO FOR STABS SUCCESSFUL STABS AREMOST VALUABLE WARRIOR MUCH MORE VALUABLEBECAUSE HE KILLED THREE TO VICTORY THAN LETHAL STRIKES SEE SIEGWURST OVER HERE? EVERYONE THINKS HES OUR FRENCHMAN IN EACH OF THE LAST TEN BATTLES NOW LOOK AT IRK OVERHE ALONE ACCOUNTS 凵ERE HE AVERAGES Q2.1 FOR AN ADDITIONAL 3.8 WINS PER CAMPAIGN SEASON. SIEGWURST BRINGS IN 1.6 STABS PER BATTLE NOMOR READING THE SAGAS Aya NO SPIN MOVES OF ANY KIND/ THEYRE VERY IMPRESSIVE, BUT THE EXPECTED BUT REMEMBER WHENN SIEGWURST SLEW TWO COSSACKS WITHADDITIONAL WINS PER SPIN MOVE IS HIS 'DANCE OF NEGATIVE. NEGATIVE THE WHIRUNG BLADES? IN THIS ARMY, WE CARE ABOUT ONE THING, AND THATS STAB PERCENTAGE THIS IS GONNA HAVE SERIOUS NEGATIVE EFFECTS ON MORALE WHICH CORRELATES WITH EXACTUY NOTHING NOW GET STABBY! Smbc-comics.com

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Uploaded Apr 09, 2018 at 12:01PM EDT

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