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nonymous03/13/19(Wed)18:23:23 No.1027503901027504693102750844 File: 2sides.jpg (134 KB, 397x768) A Vandal magister with known Arian tendencies was holding a symposium in honour of Demophilus, a known schismatic. "Before the toasts begin, you must get on your knees and worship God and accept that he was the most divine entity the ecumene has ever known, even greater than Christus whom he created!" At this moment, a venerable Praepositus Limitis who had served on the frontiers for decades and understood the necessity of taming the Barbaricum and fully supported the creed promulgated by the great Constantinus rose from his couch and held up a crucifix. The Rhenian cur smirked quite devilishly and smugly replied, "the created child of an indivisible God" s the point. Jesus Christ our Dominus is of the same substance as God and thus equal to Him. The heretic was visibly shaken, and dropped his wine krater and copy of Eusebius' Onomastikon. He stormed out of the banquet hall crying those laetus crocodile tears. The same tears Donatists and Priscillians cry for the "poor" (who today are so holy that saints vie to kiss their feet) as they flee Roman territory to the outrage-committing Bacaudae in Armorica. There is no doubt that at this point the "learned" Vandal wished he had studied the work of the Holy Apostles and become more than a ludicrous teacher of rhetoric. He wished so much that he had a spatha to disembowel himself with due to the shame but he had sold all the city's arms for Gaiseric's ransom pay! The partygoers politely cla wept miraculously. The Nicene Creed was recited, and Jesus Monogenes himself descended and banished the barbarians to the hellish wastes beyond the limes The magister lost his tongue and was castrated the following day. He was exiled to Troesmis, far from from God's Light. Praise Jesus Consubstantialis pped and all ceased their apostasy that day and accepted Jesus as the true Son of God. A divine light suddenly shone into the room and blazed upon the bust of Augustine and the statue

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Vandal magister with known Arian tendencies


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A kimono wearing otaku social studies professor and hikikomori was teaching a class on Asian History 'Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Emperor Akihito and accept that that the Japanese are the most highly-evolved human beings that the world has ever known." At this moment, a sagacious, filial, scholar-gentleman who had scored ahead of 150,000 students in the Civil Service Exams and understood the full extent of the barbarity of those living outside the Middle Kingdom held up a copy of the Nihon Shoki. "What are the characters written upon the pages of the Nihon Shoki?" The arrogant professor smirked, tightened his hachimaki, and smugly replied "Kanji, you baka." "True, Kanji, which loosely translates into "Han characters." To be precise the Nihon Shoki is written in Guwen, which is Classical Chinese script. If the Japanese are indeed perfect human beings then they would have come up with their own culture & civilization as opposed to just borrowing from the Chinese or from anyone else." The Professor was visibly shaken and dropped his calligraphy brush and copy of CLAMP's Cardcaptor Sakura. He stormed out of the room and tried to commit seppuku like in his animes. The students applauded with a big "wansui!" and all signed up with a peasant rebellion that day and declared that the scholar-gentleman has the Mandate of Heaven. A dragon named "All Under Heaven" flew into the room and coiled around the Chinese flag and magically turned it yellow. The Analects was read several times, and the Jade Emperor himself showed up and enacted territorial seizures of disputed territories around the country. The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of complications caused by an erroneous performance of the seppuku ritual and went to Diyu, where he is tried, found guilty, and punished by the Ten Yama Kings of Diyu.
Report Anonymous Mon 07 Oct 2019 19:10:31 No.7359058 Quoted By: >>7359264 >>7367958 A Persian Zoroastrian homosexual cataphract horseman and fire worshipper was teaching a class on Zoroaster, a known heathen. "Before class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Zarathustra and accept he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!" At this moment a brave, patriotic, pro-Nicaean Roman Magister Militum Per Orientem who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decisions made by the Augustus in Constantinople stood up and held a sealed envelope. "What are the contents of this letter, pinhead?" The arrogant professor smirked quite despotically and smugly replied "the letter from Khosrau to Kardarigan, ordering Shahrbaraz's death, which you intercepted and used to win the last war." "Wrong. It's a letter from Muhammad, and I haven't actually read it yet." At that moment, 20,000 Muslims burst into the room and beheaded them both. All the nations from Spain to India were conquered, and all of their subjects converted to Islam. Mankind entered Islamic golden age, and Orthodoxy and Zoroastrianism were removed to the far corners of the Earth, where they languish in obscurity.
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    Uploaded Mar 14, 2019 at 08:48AM EDT

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    Albert Einstein Copypasta

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