Submission 3,169

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114. Don't talk s--- about your baby. Friend, if I've traveled to your inconvenient neighborhood to meet you for dinner, and I ask, "How's baby?," I'm going to need you to parry with something better than, “Baby's fine, boring,” shrug, eye roll.

2. You may callously cancel almost any plans up until 2 p.m. At 2 p.m., there's still ample time for your friend - if they so choose to text around and find another dinner companion. By three, they almost certainly will be alone for the night. (This doesn't apply if you want to cancel on someone who is cooking for you in that situation, you have to tell them the night before.) - - -

37. Don't feel bad about standing up in the aisle immediately upon the plane landing. Flying is bad enough already. Do what you can to make things better for yourself. Just don't knock down elderly people on the way.

40. Do not touch the small of my back to move around me at the bar if you're ugly. One time, I was in a very spacious bar with at least a good two feet behind me, and then I felt it: a hand on my lower back like a piece of sandpaper. I turned around to find a man whose head was shaped like Caillou's staring back at me. It's awkward, uncomfortable, and unnecessary. A nice little "Excuse me" would suffice. Is the music too loud? Give me a tap on the shoulder. Tarkor Zehn

6. Never wake up your significant other on purpose, ever.

18. If you're a dating adult, you should own lube. It doesn't matter who you have sex with.

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Overview

The Cut's "Etiquette Rules" List refers to a controversial article published by New York Magazine sub-outlet The Cut, which aims to lay forth ground rules for how to interact in modern society. Many of the items on the list, including "Never tell people what your job is," "Don't bore dinner parties with your food allergies" and "You don't have to read your friends' book," proved divisive upon its publication in early February 2023, leading to backlash and discussion online.

Background

On February 2nd, 2023, The Cut^[1] published a list of rules for interacting in modern society. The list is 140 items long and purports to offer guidelines for tricky social situations. The tips are in categories, such as parenting, texting, romantic relationships, work, etc. Most of the tips have short blurbs beneath them and are usually meant to be lighthearted and witty.

Do You Know How to Behave? Are You Sure? How to text, tip, ghost, host, and generally exist in polite society today. ㅅ

Developments

Upon its release on February 2nd, 2023, the article proved contentious among readers and many recommendations were critically posted to Twitter and mocked. For example, one "rule" titled "Don't foist your allergies onto a dinner party," which recommends not telling a dinner host if you have food allergies or sensitivities, generated much discussion. That same day, Twitter user @ChelseaCristine^[2] called it "callous and dangerous" (shown below, left). User @CoreyAnnHaydu^[3] made a similar argument about the "rule," gaining over 40 retweets and 380 likes in less than 24 hours (shown below, right).

Chelsea Cristene Bock @ChelseaCristene This morning @TheCut published an exhaustive list of "etiquette rules" that included advice for people with food allergies to "not say a word to the host" and simply eat when we get home. I don't have the words for how callous or dangerous this is. THE CUT GIVE A GIFT 52. Don't foist your allergies onto a dinner party. Once, I gave a dinner party with my ex, who was a fantastic cook. He created a five- course menu and made the pasta by hand. Then a famous designer - I won't say who showed up with a blender filled with the ingredients for his own meal. He was on some very restricted diet. If I were on a very restricted diet or if I were gluten free, or vegan, or anything, I would not say a word to my host. At a dinner party, it's about what the host wants to do. Just pick at what you can, then eat when you get home. - Wendy Goodman 12:34 PM. Feb 2, 2023 2,050 Views

Corey Ann Haydu @CoreyAnnHaydu Look. I'm sure @TheCut is getting lots of feedback on their etiquette list but this is so offensive. The situation described here isn't a person with an allergy. And a person with a severe allergy cannot just be all chill and not inform ppl making them dinner of said allergy 52. Don't foist your allergies onto a dinner party. Once, I gave a dinner party with my ex, who was a fantastic cook. He created a five-course menu and made the pasta by hand. Then a famous designer — I won't say who showed with a blender filled up with the ingredients for his own meal. He was on some very restricted diet. If I were on a very restricted diet or if I were gluten free, or vegan, or anything, I would not say a word to my host. At a dinner party, it's about what the host wants to do. Just pick -

Many other points also proved controversial on Twitter as the list was dissected and criticized. On February 3rd, 2023, Twitter user @RaxKingIsDead^[4] posted a thread singling out nine different "rules" they found terrible, including "Never show you're impressed by anyone" and "Don't post RIPs for celebrities" (example shown below, left). On February 2nd, user @Russ_Steinberg^[5] posted several "rules" and joked it was the most "unhinged, arbitrary list of all time" (shown below, right).

rax 'leads with her crotch' king @RaxkingIs Dead rax presents: The Worst of The Cut's Etiquette List! item 1 is a normal thing to do in new york and a great way to get hit by a car in the entire rest of the country 106. If you are a fast walker and the person in front of you on the sidewalk is walking slowly, do not walk directly behind them for blocks on end. Just sidestep into the street and go around them. ... 7:51 AM. Feb 3, 2023 88.7K Views

Russell Steinberg @Russ_Steinberg Idk why everyone is dragging The Cut. It's not like they posted the most unhinged list of arbitrary rules of all- time. - 99. Ignore your colleagues on the subway. I like to think of my subway commute as "me time." I know, objectively speaking, that this is untrue, that the train during rush hour is jammed with 1 it bowls of cigarettes at a who are not me. Nevertheles, under certain ideal ercumstances, the hoke inside. bustling subway is a place where I can step outside my life, a no-man's-land between home and office, where, on the way to work, I can read a book in the quiet lull before battle and where, on the way back, I can reflect on the day that has passed. The commute, in the right light, is a sacred space not to be infringed upon. ing adult, you should ow ou have sex with. 5:00 PM Feb 2, 2023 1,723 Views • And certainly not to be violated with regularity. I once knew a married couple who commuted together every day so they could talk - sounded READ MORE Do not touch the small of my back to move arou t the bar if you're ugly. ne, I was in a very spacious bar with at least a good two feet behi d then I felt it: a hand on my lower back like a piece of sandpape around to find a man whose head was shaped like Caillou's stari me. It's awkward, uncomfortable, and unnecessary. A nice little e me" would suffice. Is the music too loud? Give me a tap on the er. Tarkor Zehn

Controversial "Rules" Examples

71. If you put out bowls of cigarettes at a party, you have to let people smoke inside. They're not décor.

Search Interest

External References

^[1] The Cut – Do You Know How to Behave? Are You Sure?

^[2] Twitter – ChelseaCristene

^[3] Twitter – CoreyAnnHaydu

^[4] Twitter – @RaxKingIsDead

^[5] Twitter – Russ_Steinberg

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The Cut's "Etiquette Rules" List

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