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Jizzus Christ

Added 6 years ago / Updated 6 years ago
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About

"Jizzus Christ" is the nickname of an anonymous 4chan user known for his annual photos he would post showing his alleged collection of semen he'd ejaculated from the previous year. These photos are posted on the day after Christmas, also known as Jizzmas, on /b/. However, in 2018, the user revealed that it was, in fact, a hoax.

Origin

Beginning in 2007, Jizzus Christ has uploaded a photo of soda bottles on 4chan's /b/ board every year in December. Each bottle is filled to the brim with a thick, frothy, cloudy liquid that is supposedly his semen.[1]

Spread

The photos of his yearly procurement have been shared on various websites across the internet such as Reddit,[2][7] SomethingAwful,[3] and Bodybuilding's Misc board.[4] Jizzus Christ has also spawned several copycats and imitators including an instance with a My Little Pony figure and a wooden post.[3][8]

I come before you today to reveal a horrible accident to the Pony C-- Jar Project. The place where I was hiding my c-- jar were actually on top of a kind of radiator, that was connected to our furnace. basically the Rainbow Dash figure has been have also got another glass of c--'
Santa Cust wenty years later one boy and one gir n the light of our lord "c-- in bottles" I have been inspired to create a little something of my own using my seed atter taps. It all started the day I forgot next big thing it has been a year and a half and I have wiped my semen on said post after every time I wank and a year and a haitf later it has become so tithy in is hard to hide it from my family. I will report back to ol annually on the same day as our lord does and you all can watch the c--, I hope to the joy in their eyes, the faith of their smle, oh my god I love that time of the year want to know it the magic of christmas will happen to the kids 2592x1936) my boy has waken sister just to catch Santa Claus red-handed Norrmal post for comparison, I promise you all my c-- crusade etemal See you 6:58.33 No 659508979 MB, 200x180) >Santa drops his pants ostans fapping christmas magic that just tell on then leaves, my kids are standing under the j---, eyes glistering and mouth open. (35 KB, 661x720) in epic bread Ln H-------- OP, im in awe 7:17:58 No.659510887 REALLY G0OD Epic crusty bread 659510584 Anonymous 12/2615Sa1)17.35:17 No.659512694 Christmas is complete You better watch ou ㈠OLY F------ S--- THE wiLD RIDE STARTS AGAIN! I'm teling you why he's putting his tongue post this time >He knows if youre he knows if youve been bad or good so be good for f-----'s sake 17:501 MB, 1149x1995) This one's on me 6:46 17 No. Didnt think you wouid do it OP. Im impressed. Trips well spen Holy f------ s---.I dont even know what to think about this. 1226/15(5ar)16:49.05 No.659508042 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sat)17:51:15 No.659514411 File: ABANDON THREADI(54 KB, 5880449) >You can call me captain s--- post i lke you Stay true to yourseit and accomplish your dreams my friend 2592x1936) See you next year course! Also sory guys I've gotta leave for my grandparents, Ii come back next year for all the good /bloys and girls, Santa crust out you Op 17:071 mageiog (25 KB, 410x312) 21-07 No. 659511228 439x480) File: File Flle: 1451063398230ipg (49 KB, 556x561) Good bye Santa Crust 490x 735) File: 1451089151759 png (223 KB. 736x736) File: Mein Neoering(6 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sar)17:07 Mei C-- on seat you will know nigher andrew 59.10 No.659609045 750ng (394 KB, 657x360) I love where this thread going kepp going The post licking poster Or saint d---. All worthy titles for you Fle: 1412071 72153 alia atsinaopg (75 KB, 620x360) OP, stop trying to get and girls F--- IS THIS THREAD ? Anonymous 12/26/15(Sa)1653 20 No 659508460 Anonymous 1226/15(Sat)17.0 43No 65950950 צ¡tes1029 mtw OP probably thought about this last year and started c------ preparation for a 4chan thread -mtw even it OP didnt plan it he stil got excited about the prospect of being a celebutard File: 4ing (747 Anonymous 1226/15(Sat)17:00.40 No.659609192 What did you gain from it besides anonymous /b/ fame? File: imag9 22ipg (3 KB, 303x566) actually delivers Anonymous 12/26/15(5 )17:03:4 Our Lord and Saviour will c-- I made sarta crust lick his post. I feel like I have accomplished someting today Anonymous 12/26/15(Sar)16:52 50 No 659508409265950610 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sat)17:0102 No.659609222 OP here, trying to upload a bigger picture of the post but phone is being a n-----. By the way it tasted salty bur like a f------ vile salty favour and I feel like puking tbh, hope I dont get sick Picture doesnt look ike my tongue is touching but beleve Jizzus would be proud. Waiting for him. Haha you sick f--- tongue is agairst the post. Blehhh a family dinner soon, merry christmas everyonel 17:01:1 s 12/26/15(5)17:03:53 No.659509554 2:659509684 22659502676 0047g (16 KB, 218x290) That's amazing OP I love you Merry Christmas OP Proud of you just... have this bad teeling...that..Jizzmass will not come this year: Fle: Lapprowe-ot thispotig (200 KB, 600x542) NOW IS THIS CAPPED ANON? Jizzuz Cheist and his minion, Sama Crust. Santa crast, you visiting the krusty krab any time soon? Anonymous 12/26/15(3an)1658:03 No.659508937 holy f--- name ! Santa Crust! esus christ 17:00:05 17:00 arta crus Thats amazing OP I love you. s just...i have this bad teeling... that.. Jizzmass will not come this year t Anonymous 12/26/15(Sar)17:30 06 No 659512163 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sa1)17:02:25 No.659609385 Next year i won't waiting for Jizzus and his sidekick Santa Crust to c--. Someone screencap this and introduce santa crust to jizzus Santa Crust

2018 Hoax Reveal

"Jizzus" returned on December 27th, 2018 to reveal that the bottles were in fact ginger beer, writing:[5][6]

Hello Anons.

My name is of no concern. Many years ago I posted images like the one you see as a little joke. It gathered some traction so I posted similar images for the next few years.

While the joke was initially funny I think it's been going on for far too long now. What you have come to Jizzus is actually just some guy who brewed Ginger Beer at home and thought it looked like jizz.

I figured I'd be obvious with the yeast sediment at the bottom but very few people ever caught on. I no longer brew ginger beer, it was only a phase so that's why I've not posted any images.

c---b 2012.jpg (228 KB, 1359x1059) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 12/27/18(Thu)00:10:07 No.788317859>788318009 >>788318092 >>788318160 >>788318259 >>788318364 >>788318436 >>788318517 >>788318552 >>788318620 >>788318670 Hello Anons My name is of no concern. Many years ago l posted images like the one you see as a little joke.t gathered some traction so I posted similar images for the next few years While the joke was initially funny I think it's been going on for far too long now. What you have come to Jizzus is actually just some guy who brewed Ginger Beer at home and thought it looked like j--- Ifigured l'd be obvious with the yeast sediment at the bottom but very few people ever caught on. I no longer brew ginger beer, it was only a phase so that's why I've not posted any images

Search Interest

External References

[1] eduncovered Yahoo

[2] reddit Jizzus Christ 7th Year Cum Collection Update 2013 : cringepics

[3] somethingawful The 7th Cumming of Jizzus Christ – The Something Awful Forums

[4] Bodybuilding.com Jesus H Christ I think I've just streamed porn to my parents TV !! – Bodybuilding.com Forums

[5] archive.fo /b/ – Hello Anons. My name is of no concern. Many years – Random – 4chan

[6] thebarchive Yahoo

[7] reddit [Off-Site] Guy collects semen in several bottles through the years. /b/ro does some calculations on the matter. : theydidthemath

[8] funnyjunk Jizzus christ and Santa Crust

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Jizzus Christ

Jizzus Christ

Part of a series on 4chan. [View Related Entries]
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Updated Jan 03, 2019 at 05:43PM EST by Matt.

Added Dec 27, 2018 at 02:43AM EST by F-86_Sabre.

PROTIP: Press 'i' to view the image gallery, 'v' to view the video gallery, or 'r' to view a random entry.

This entry contains content that may be considered sensitive to some viewers.

About

"Jizzus Christ" is the nickname of an anonymous 4chan user known for his annual photos he would post showing his alleged collection of semen he'd ejaculated from the previous year. These photos are posted on the day after Christmas, also known as Jizzmas, on /b/. However, in 2018, the user revealed that it was, in fact, a hoax.

Origin

Beginning in 2007, Jizzus Christ has uploaded a photo of soda bottles on 4chan's /b/ board every year in December. Each bottle is filled to the brim with a thick, frothy, cloudy liquid that is supposedly his semen.[1]



Spread

The photos of his yearly procurement have been shared on various websites across the internet such as Reddit,[2][7] SomethingAwful,[3] and Bodybuilding's Misc board.[4] Jizzus Christ has also spawned several copycats and imitators including an instance with a My Little Pony figure and a wooden post.[3][8]


I come before you today to reveal a horrible accident to the Pony C-- Jar Project. The place where I was hiding my c-- jar were actually on top of a kind of radiator, that was connected to our furnace. basically the Rainbow Dash figure has been have also got another glass of c--' Santa Cust wenty years later one boy and one gir n the light of our lord "c-- in bottles" I have been inspired to create a little something of my own using my seed atter taps. It all started the day I forgot next big thing it has been a year and a half and I have wiped my semen on said post after every time I wank and a year and a haitf later it has become so tithy in is hard to hide it from my family. I will report back to ol annually on the same day as our lord does and you all can watch the c--, I hope to the joy in their eyes, the faith of their smle, oh my god I love that time of the year want to know it the magic of christmas will happen to the kids 2592x1936) my boy has waken sister just to catch Santa Claus red-handed Norrmal post for comparison, I promise you all my c-- crusade etemal See you 6:58.33 No 659508979 MB, 200x180) >Santa drops his pants ostans fapping christmas magic that just tell on then leaves, my kids are standing under the j---, eyes glistering and mouth open. (35 KB, 661x720) in epic bread Ln H-------- OP, im in awe 7:17:58 No.659510887 REALLY G0OD Epic crusty bread 659510584 Anonymous 12/2615Sa1)17.35:17 No.659512694 Christmas is complete You better watch ou ㈠OLY F------ S--- THE wiLD RIDE STARTS AGAIN! I'm teling you why he's putting his tongue post this time >He knows if youre he knows if youve been bad or good so be good for f-----'s sake 17:501 MB, 1149x1995) This one's on me 6:46 17 No. Didnt think you wouid do it OP. Im impressed. Trips well spen Holy f------ s---.I dont even know what to think about this. 1226/15(5ar)16:49.05 No.659508042 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sat)17:51:15 No.659514411 File: ABANDON THREADI(54 KB, 5880449) >You can call me captain s--- post i lke you Stay true to yourseit and accomplish your dreams my friend 2592x1936) See you next year course! Also sory guys I've gotta leave for my grandparents, Ii come back next year for all the good /bloys and girls, Santa crust out you Op 17:071 mageiog (25 KB, 410x312) 21-07 No. 659511228 439x480) File: File Flle: 1451063398230ipg (49 KB, 556x561) Good bye Santa Crust 490x 735) File: 1451089151759 png (223 KB. 736x736) File: Mein Neoering(6 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sar)17:07 Mei C-- on seat you will know nigher andrew 59.10 No.659609045 750ng (394 KB, 657x360) I love where this thread going kepp going The post licking poster Or saint d---. All worthy titles for you Fle: 1412071 72153 alia atsinaopg (75 KB, 620x360) OP, stop trying to get and girls F--- IS THIS THREAD ? Anonymous 12/26/15(Sa)1653 20 No 659508460 Anonymous 1226/15(Sat)17.0 43No 65950950 צ¡tes1029 mtw OP probably thought about this last year and started c------ preparation for a 4chan thread -mtw even it OP didnt plan it he stil got excited about the prospect of being a celebutard File: 4ing (747 Anonymous 1226/15(Sat)17:00.40 No.659609192 What did you gain from it besides anonymous /b/ fame? File: imag9 22ipg (3 KB, 303x566) actually delivers Anonymous 12/26/15(5 )17:03:4 Our Lord and Saviour will c-- I made sarta crust lick his post. I feel like I have accomplished someting today Anonymous 12/26/15(Sar)16:52 50 No 659508409265950610 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sat)17:0102 No.659609222 OP here, trying to upload a bigger picture of the post but phone is being a n-----. By the way it tasted salty bur like a f------ vile salty favour and I feel like puking tbh, hope I dont get sick Picture doesnt look ike my tongue is touching but beleve Jizzus would be proud. Waiting for him. Haha you sick f--- tongue is agairst the post. Blehhh a family dinner soon, merry christmas everyonel 17:01:1 s 12/26/15(5)17:03:53 No.659509554 2:659509684 22659502676 0047g (16 KB, 218x290) That's amazing OP I love you Merry Christmas OP Proud of you just... have this bad teeling...that..Jizzmass will not come this year: Fle: Lapprowe-ot thispotig (200 KB, 600x542) NOW IS THIS CAPPED ANON? Jizzuz Cheist and his minion, Sama Crust. Santa crast, you visiting the krusty krab any time soon? Anonymous 12/26/15(3an)1658:03 No.659508937 holy f--- name ! Santa Crust! esus christ 17:00:05 17:00 arta crus Thats amazing OP I love you. s just...i have this bad teeling... that.. Jizzmass will not come this year t Anonymous 12/26/15(Sar)17:30 06 No 659512163 Anonymous 12/26/15(Sa1)17:02:25 No.659609385 Next year i won't waiting for Jizzus and his sidekick Santa Crust to c--. Someone screencap this and introduce santa crust to jizzus Santa Crust

2018 Hoax Reveal

"Jizzus" returned on December 27th, 2018 to reveal that the bottles were in fact ginger beer, writing:[5][6]

Hello Anons.

My name is of no concern. Many years ago I posted images like the one you see as a little joke. It gathered some traction so I posted similar images for the next few years.

While the joke was initially funny I think it's been going on for far too long now. What you have come to Jizzus is actually just some guy who brewed Ginger Beer at home and thought it looked like jizz.

I figured I'd be obvious with the yeast sediment at the bottom but very few people ever caught on. I no longer brew ginger beer, it was only a phase so that's why I've not posted any images.


c---b 2012.jpg (228 KB, 1359x1059) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 12/27/18(Thu)00:10:07 No.788317859>788318009 >>788318092 >>788318160 >>788318259 >>788318364 >>788318436 >>788318517 >>788318552 >>788318620 >>788318670 Hello Anons My name is of no concern. Many years ago l posted images like the one you see as a little joke.t gathered some traction so I posted similar images for the next few years While the joke was initially funny I think it's been going on for far too long now. What you have come to Jizzus is actually just some guy who brewed Ginger Beer at home and thought it looked like j--- Ifigured l'd be obvious with the yeast sediment at the bottom but very few people ever caught on. I no longer brew ginger beer, it was only a phase so that's why I've not posted any images

Search Interest

External References

[1] eduncovered Yahoo

[2] reddit Jizzus Christ 7th Year Cum Collection Update 2013 : cringepics

[3] somethingawful The 7th Cumming of Jizzus Christ – The Something Awful Forums

[4] Bodybuilding.com Jesus H Christ I think I've just streamed porn to my parents TV !! – Bodybuilding.com Forums

[5] archive.fo /b/ – Hello Anons. My name is of no concern. Many years – Random – 4chan

[6] thebarchive Yahoo

[7] reddit [Off-Site] Guy collects semen in several bottles through the years. /b/ro does some calculations on the matter. : theydidthemath

[8] funnyjunk Jizzus christ and Santa Crust

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Artichoke
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Artichoke

sad to know he was a phony, but better he turned out fake than to be a poor soul who beat his dick black and blue for /b/ of all places.
what would one do with several bottles of jizz anyways? can’t donate it, the jizz might’ve gone bad. i’d throw it at people, or somehow make a bottle rocket/bomb and get back at some neighbors who owe me.

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