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SON OF A F--- Cassowaries are badass. This right here is 7 feet of pure, unadulterated assholery. A cassowary can run at speeds up to 50km/h and will freakin' bulldoze anything that gets in its way. Happily. See that dinosaur helmet she's got going? That thing will mess you up. Also, she can jump high enough to kick you right in the t--. Oh, and she has a 13cm claw on each foot Did you hear that? 13cm. 5 inches. Go measure that. I'll wait. Yeah. YEAH, DID YOU SEE THE LENGTH OF THAT THING? That thing can take off limbs. It can disembowel a grown human. It can do these things, and it will. Happily. It even swims. IT SWIMS. Okay? Yeah, that's right. Like you needed another reason not to go in the water. Nobody wants to swim with a leaping dinosaursharkbird. It has been named the deadliest bird in the world and has the aggression of a PMSing dragon. If confronted by a cassowary, you need to stand tall, look it in the eye, hold your ground, and die like a little bitch.

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idk if y'all americans and that know this, but in Australia instead of snow at christmas we get these lil shiny bugs everywhere and they're attracted to the christmas lights and we call them christmas beetles and despite being australian they don't bite or anything they just crawl around on your hand and it's such a good and pure feeling and yeah cryoverkiltmilk 'despite being australian' thefingerfuckingfemalefury "We know what your thinking but this does not want to kill you"

What the governments of the world don't want you to know!

Young Australians summarized in one picture: Skinny white guy, his smug Asian girlfriend and the ogre looking white woman next to them that used to be the regular breeding stock of the land

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Australia - Niiiiiiice Birdy.....

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SON OF A F--- Cassowaries are badass. This right here is 7 feet of pure, unadulterated assholery. A cassowary can run at speeds up to 50km/h and will freakin' bulldoze anything that gets in its way. Happily. See that dinosaur helmet she's got going? That thing will mess you up. Also, she can jump high enough to kick you right in the t--. Oh, and she has a 13cm claw on each foot Did you hear that? 13cm. 5 inches. Go measure that. I'll wait. Yeah. YEAH, DID YOU SEE THE LENGTH OF THAT THING? That thing can take off limbs. It can disembowel a grown human. It can do these things, and it will. Happily. It even swims. IT SWIMS. Okay? Yeah, that's right. Like you needed another reason not to go in the water. Nobody wants to swim with a leaping dinosaursharkbird. It has been named the deadliest bird in the world and has the aggression of a PMSing dragon. If confronted by a cassowary, you need to stand tall, look it in the eye, hold your ground, and die like a little bitch.

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Uploaded Oct 30, 2015 at 10:36PM EDT

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