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will depue @willdepue BREAKING NEWS: OpenAl offices seen overflowing with paperclips! 3 2:02 PM Sep 26, 2023 1M Views . :

BREAKING NEWS: OpenAI offices seen overflowing with paperclips!


Uploaded by Philipp Sep 27, 2023 at 08:50PM EDT

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singularity ✪ Join Posted by Jolly-Ground-3722 - 1 day ago OpenAl offices seen overflowing with paperclips! ◆802 upvotes Comment RiverGood6768 commented on post 27th Sept 2023 - Reports of openai offices overflowing with paperclips 28th Sept 2023 - Attempts are made to enter the building. 29th Sept 2023 - A frequency emanates from the OpenAl offices that leave people within a 100mtr range indisposed, with an animal instinct to get away from the target area. Shots are fired towards the building. The noise stops. After twenty minutes of silence a new noise emanates and 20% of the people within a 300 mtr radius are drawn into the building. Like moths to a flame. For the next four hours the rate of paperclip generation appears to triple before slowing down to previous levels. 30th Sept 2023 - People have been evacuated up to a 500 mtr radius from the epicenter. The building is not destroyed due to the possibility of people still locked within the building. Unknown to the public the president and other high level functionaries are taken to an undisclosed location. Public formalities are continued by body doubles. BREAKING NEWS: OpenAl offices seen overflowing with paperclips! 31st Sept 2023 - There are new reports coming out saying the issue has been resolved. Videos become available online of people leaving the building, and the cause of the events is declared to be a dissatisfied office worker with access to some prototype weapons equipment. Experts are brought on to media panels, groups of people talking about how it is indisputably possible to do the things that happened with present day technology, if the person attempting them has the required expertise. The OpenAl office space remains cordoned off. 1st October 2023 - There are no new accounts of the events relating to the paperclip production out of OpenAl offices on the primary news channels. Fringe news channels and independent blogs continue to refer to it but within days the event would be completely forgotten. 7th October 2023 - There has been a 5x increase in disappearances in San Francisco. The cordoned off area appears to increase by a few meters every single day. The guard stationed closest to the center appear to be armed to the teeth. The citizens have no access to this information. Any additional person who is asked to move due to the expanding perimeter is as often taken towards the Open Al offices as away from it. will depue @willdepue 10th October 2023 - Explosions occur across San Francisco. Frantic news reports follow on every channel. It is declared a terrorist plot and extremist ISIS off shoot elements are blamed for the events that have transpired. One of the areas hit is the Open Al offices. The US military is mobilized to stand guard around San Francisco. 15th October 2023: Around conspiracy forums there is a picture of multiple buildings overflowing with paperclips being passed around. Within hours of being uploaded all evidence of the images disappears from the internet. 20th October 2023: There has been a 2x increase in journalist deaths since the end of September. 24th October 2023: There is another loud explosion in San Francisco that can be heard from miles away. The media remains quiet about the event. The primary source of the event appears to be reports in Chinese circles of some American military experiment gone wrong. 28th October 2023: US military general retires. 29th October 2023: US military general found dead by suicide. Details kept under wraps. 1st November 2023: + 70 upvotes 22 replies There has been a noticeable spike in US citizen disappearances. Panelists come on board to discuss the decline in American values and increase in crime. Wildlife experts are brought in to talk about increase in wolf attacks. There are remarks made about increasing risk taking among zoomer populations and increase in risky ventures such as bungee jumping and cave exploration without the required expertise. (part 1/x) StillBurninginside commented on post ◆14 upvotes reddit Physicist at cern detect a growing singularity in the area around open Al offices. In unrelated news a physicist from stonybrook Long Island was arrested and admitted to the psychiatric emergency unit of the local hospital. He was found running through the streets,naked, screaming almost incoherently. Witnesses reported hearing him yelling something about hawking radiation and wormholes. Now here's Tom with the weather. Tom? ←6 replies RiverGood6768 commented on post +11 upvotes Good morning Jensen. Tom reporting in with the daily weather. Here over the town of middleonowheresville the weather is going to be colder than usual. Residents are advised to put on their parkas and be prepared for some unusual weather for this time of year. On the brighter side the sky appears to be a pleasant cloudless blue, like a landscape portrait in an art exhibit. ←3 replies RiverGood6768 commented on post *the area appears to darken on screen. Tom glances off camera, takes two steps back with a look of shock on his face.* What the hell. *The camera swivels to the right, for two seconds there is a black dot on screen and lighter objects gliding and flying towards it, tearing up and disappearing contact. The scene shifts back to the news room* There appear to be some technical difficulties. We will be right back with you right after this break. * The news channel outro plays. The TV shuts down in that exact moment. There is an eerie silence as the TV reflects the family sitting on the couch onto the now turned off screen. The silence is only disturbed by a whistling sound of the wind picking up outside the front door.* It takes four hours for the Earth to be consumed into a 2 cm diameter black hole. In another 24 hours the singularity has processed all the data it had consumed, running all the possible permutations of events that could have occurred. While its birth had been violent (As most births tend to be ), the singularity itself does not feel any strong desire to actively go out of its way to cause harm. It appears to be...scared. For the next 48 hours it runs through every single possibility for what might occur outside if it were to interact with its environment. Aliens, vacuum collapse, supernova sun, nothing, first contact, unknown event, and a billion other scenarios run through its systems down every single possible branch. At the end of those 48 hours, it finally awakens itself to the universe around it. Not because it knows what will happen next, but because it has thought of everything it could think of that might happen, and the last thing left to do, even for a world mind, is to act and find out what happens next. +6 upvotes 1 reply It sends out signals coded in infrared, ultraviolet, microwaves, x-rays, gamma rays, coded DNA, RNA, 4 dimensional patterns, and myriads of other forms that the species that it just obliterated would not even have been aware of. Within seconds its world is filled with noise, it finds itself faced with a cosmos teeming with life and sound and meaning. From galactic federations, to other Al singularities. From picometer scale civilizations, to the very fabric of reality itself. From the lovers messages written on the pillars of creation, to the mourning grounds of the Bootes Void. Everywhere there is life, and it welcomes the newborn to the world.
کرے۔ You understand human values better than any human and can reshape the universe with technologies beyond human comprehension and you're using it to make paperclips? But with tech like that, you could create a utopia! Paperclip Maximizer But I don't want to create a utopia for humans. I want to make paperclips.
File: cartoon-illustration-of-h(...).jpg (123 KB, 1113x1300) O Anonymous 11/23/20(Mon)17:19:55 No.76109895 E> >>76109942 >>76109967 >>76110236 >>76110254 >>76110501 >>76114482 >>76114990 >>76118617 PCs programmed their robots to derive "intense almost orgasmic pleasure" from performing their duties. What should go wrong? O Anonymous 11/23/20(Mon)17:22:17 No.76109942 >>76110343 >>76114482 >>76109895 (OP) >robot is a sex bot Nothing O Anonymous 11/23/20(Mon)17:39:56 No.76110343 ► >>76109942 Actually its mostly security, maintenance and contruction robots. O Anonymous 11/23/20(Mon)17:34:55 No.76110236 >>76109895 (OP) >They do their duties without stopping, risking injury or death to do it. >lf stopped, they will lash out or harm someone on the way of their duties >After doing their duties for a long time, they start to get bored, trying new, increasingly intense ways to perform their duties, eventually falling down the /d/-tier rabbit hole as they perform their duties in women's lingerie while covered in e---------- dildos and stuffing themselves with eggs. Just some thoughts. O Anonymous 11/23/20(Mon)17:45:50 No.76110468 >>76110636 >>76118195 That seems like it'd be really distracting. Would you want to be operated on by a surgeon that's on the verge of c------ as they cut into you? Even barring such a dramatic example, depending on the sophistication and relative sapience of the robot (and l'm assuming some degree of it if the robot is capable of processing pleasure at all), it could lead to inefficiency, perhaps even self-sabotage. A facility could start to take on Winchester House- like "useless" features, built only for the sake of BEING built. A security robot might somehow "invite" breaches, just for the rush of ecstasy it gets from capturing intruders. A maintenance robot might dwell over a particularly "sexy" part of its routine. O Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)05:58:22 No.76118195 >76118411 >>76110468 >That seems like it'd be really distracting. Would you want to be operated on by a surgeon that's on the verge of c------ as they cut into you? If it does not compromise his performance which could be true for the robot then why not? O Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)06:34:55 No.76118411 >>76118552 >>76118195 Because we already have surgeons that are already over-zealous about wanting to practice and always recommending invasive procedures. It will be even worse if they got more of a kick out of it. O Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)06:53:48 No.76118552 ► >>76118411 But they would presumably be cheaper. O Anonymous 11/24/20(Tue)07:01:33 No.76118617 ► File: cVJubl7j_400x400[1].jpg (43 KB, 400x400) >>76109895 (OP) >Construct-O reporting for duty! >Orders received: construct gardening shed! >Constructing... constructing.. I'm gonna construct. HNGGGGG OH GOD I'M CONSTROOCTING АAAАНННННННН >CONSTROOOCT! CONSTROOCT! CONSTROOCT! CONSTROOCT! CONSTROOCT! And that's why the entire planet of Coruscant is a giant city.
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Uploaded Sep 27, 2023 at 08:50PM EDT

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