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The Signs As...

The Signs As...

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Updated Jun 17, 2015 at 10:35PM EDT by Brad.

Added Jun 15, 2015 at 11:41PM EDT by Precious Roy.

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About

"The Signs As", also known as "according to your sign," is a phrasal template used in a series of novelty horoscopes on Tumblr, which assign humorous descriptions for each of the 12 signs of the modern zodiac based on a specified theme.

Origin

On November 29th, 2011, Tumblr user theshewxlf[7] submitted a post titled "Sex facts according to your sign," listing various sexual interests and attitudes for each zodiac sign (shown below).


theshewxlf Follow Sex facts according to your sign ARIES- know how to suck everything TAURUS- Are Professionals at sex GEMINIS- the most obsessed about sex. CANCER- make you hot and excite you to the maximum. LEO- the only sign that can make you touch the sky VIRGO- The sweetest in bed and the best LIBRA- The best lovers SCORPIO- sex, sex n more sex SAGITTARIUS- will try anything CAPRICORN- will devour you in bed AQUARIUS- will do anything in bed. PISCES- will make you hot, excite you and have various ways of doing it #zodiac #sex facts #capricorn #aquarius #pisces #aries #taurus #gemini 906 notes

Spread

The practice appears to have remained dormant until December 18th, 2014, when Tumblr user dggif[8] submitted a list of zodiac signs paired with tweets posted by weird Twitter user Dril (shown below). Within six months, the post garnered upwards of 25,500 notes.


dggif Follow the sign's as dril tweets, aries: are you having a crap of me mate?? Are you, having a crap of me mate taurus: im sorry to everyone who has ever wanted me to apologize to them for something, and im sorry for apologizing tio you if you didnt need me to gemini: maybe sometimes both sides.. are good and bad at the same time??? im sorry if im doing this wrong. it is difficult to write cancer (SPILLING BLOOD ALL OVER KEYBOARD THIS IS WHAT U WANT. THIS IS WHAT U F------ BASTARDS WANI RIGHT (1 WEEK LATER) WHY ARE THE KEYS STICKING

On December 23rd, the "Bullshit Zodiac" Tumblr blog was launched, which features various "The Signs As" zodiac lists. On January 2nd, 2015, Tumblr user trashyoikawa[6] posted a series of Pepe the Frog images corresponding with individual zodiac signs (shown below). In the first five months, the post gained over 57,000 notes. In February, the Pretty Astronomy[1] Tumblr blog was launched, which highlights notable examples of novelty horoscopes. In the coming months, both BuzzFeed[4] and Smosh[5] published Tumblr zodiac listicles.


your frog meme according to your sign trashyoikawa aries ENOUO taurus
Click to see the full image

Various Examples


The Zodiac Signs as Teachers ARIES: Gives lots of hands-on activities but pretty strict. TAURUS: You're just not APPLYING yourself!" GEMINI: Encourages debate and class discussion. CANCER: Weekly parent-teacher conferences. LEO The hot teacher everyone has a crush on. VIRGO: Senten LIBRA: Group projects are fun SCORPIO: Easily spots cheating and plagiarizing. SAGITTARIUS: Field trips!!! CAPRICORN: Gives projects and homework like you HAVE NO LIFE. AQUARIUS: The computers/art/physics/english/math teacher. PISCES: Goes off topic in middle of lecture ce is missing a period, MINUS 5 POINTS. Aries Hermione Granger Taurus Bellatrix Lestrange Gemini Fred Weasley Cancer Dobby Leo Draco Malfoy Virgo: Lord Voldemort Libra: Minerva McGonagali1 Scorpio: Sirius Black Sagittarius: Neville Longbottom Capricorn: Harry Potter Aquarius Rubeus Hagrid Pisces: Cedric Diggory
hiyokokotsumiki-mikans+ Source: queen-meme-xvi the signs as crltikal quotes aries: you can turn that s----- knife into a t---- knife. taurus: f--- you and your formal attire. gemini: most owls can turn their heads 270 degrees in both directions. this owl can f--- itself in all directions cancer: oh, okay. guess i'll go f--- myself then leo: good evening. tonight's special is the s--- blizzard virgo: ah, just a little bit of ghost semen. a very common ingredient found in most beverages, so, might as well stick to the traditional libra: you will all feast on the f---. scorpio: his legs are trembling, his knees are weak, his mom's heavy, put your vagina in spaghetti sagittarius: i'm ready to begin my journey with a full- fledged erection and a heart of ambition. capricorn: this bastard just got re-atomized. aquarius: serenade my candy ass, come on! pisces: i would rather solve a rubiks cube using only my bare n------ than try to make that f------ jump 17,034 notes The Signs and what they are most often doing Aquarius: Beating up Gemini Pisces: Beating up Gemini Aries: Beating up Gemini Taurus: Beating up Gemini Gemini: Bleeding and crying violently cancer: Beating up Gemini Leo: Beating up Gemini Virgo: Beating up Gemini Libra: Beating up Gemini Scorpio: Beating up Gemini Sagittarius: Beating up Gemini Capricorn: Beating up Gemini

Search Interest

External References

[1] Tumblr – Pretty Astrology

[2] Tumblr – Legit Astrology

[3] Tumblr – Shit The Signs Say

[4] Buzzfeed – 25 Times Tumblr Nailed Your Star Sign

[5] Smosh – 21 Times Tumblr Figured Out The Zodiac Signs

[6] Tumblr – your frog meme according to your sign

[7] Tumblr – theshewxlf

[8] Tumblr – dggif

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