British Columnist Appears To Have Sexual Awakening Over New Prime Minister Keir Starmer, Breaking Social Media's Brain


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Published 5 months ago

Published 5 months ago

Last week, Labour claimed a resounding victory in the U.K.'s general election, meaning that Tory leader Rishi Sunak is being replaced as Prime Minister by Labour leader Keir Starmer, a man who looks like this:

Keir Starmer

Perhaps the above image doesn't stir anything within your loins, but it apparently does for British columnist Caitlin Moran, who decided to publish an opinion piece in The Times telling the world that Mr. Starmer has "turbocharged" her "arousal levels" and that the new Labour government was making her feel "fruity," which appears to be British slang for "sexually aroused."

Caitlin Moran's story

Furthermore, she seems to imply a friend in her group chat was feeling so "fruity" about the new British government that she excused herself presumably to touch herself.

Needless to say, this is quite a lot of personal information to share with readers of The Times, and the eye-catching headline quickly exasperated the internet as it stirred up reactions and memes on Twitter / X today.

We should all know less about each other A great failure of society

Moran's column contributes to an alarmingly exhaustive catalogue of people being overtly thirsty for politicians, which includes another piece by Moran in which she expressed having a crush on Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy.

Other hits in the genre include Leah McElrath imagining Beto O'Rourke as a calves-cramping lover and the Cuomosexual epidemic of 2020.

Furthermore, Moran is not the only British columnist to feel the pheromones exuding from Keir Starmer. The Spectator's Zoe Strimpel also published a piece arguing that "The Starmers Are Sexy" on the day Moran published her TMI tales of thinking about Starmer.


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